That God Christmas is over. December 25? Check - done - gone. And I'm grateful that it's over. Gifts? Check. Big holiday meals? Check. Christmas music? Triple check. Christmas movies? Check. Christmas feasts? Check. . .the scale.
So I've had a Christmas overload this year. I've traveled - from KC, to NYC, to KC, to Georgia - and I'm officially ready to begin a new year. So I'm really grateful that it's now New Year's eve - today feels really refreshing. It's a day of fresh beginnings; time to, as a Pastor I recently heard said, "leave the trash from the prior year behind." So I will do just that.
Here's 2008, a new year, fresh beginning, full of new promise and new adventures to be lived. Life is fresh, clean, bursting with hope and optimism. And I'm not THAT much of an idealist. I realize that fresh after January 1, maybe even a week later, I'm back into "real life" - commuting, going to work, making paychecks, running a small business, finding time for what's really important. . . but on New Years Eve, the dream is fresh, and alive with promise.
But what dreams should fill my heart tonight as I dream of the next 12 months? Should I dream about finally getting rid of the extra weight? Running a half marathon? Climbing fourteeners again in Colorado? Achieving success? Saving "x" amount of dollars? Getting my life "in order"? Establishing a career path? Making a life for myself? Reading the whole bible cover to cover? Reading 15 books? Writing a book? Blogging everyday? What is a worthy thing to resolve to do? Would Christ love me more if my resolutions were to pray more deeply, give more fervently, encourage more people, make someone believe in Jesus?
Are resolutions even a worthy thing to think about? They lose power after 2 days in the new year, right?
The answer: resolutions aren't just worthy to think about - they are essential. How easy is it to get sucked into the drudgery of life - at times living lives that lack passion, purpose, and hope. Resolutions return me to dream and hope in a faith that has escaped me toward the end of 2007. Resolutions return me to a passionate pursuit of my beautiful wife. Resolutions return me to the desire to be the hero of my boys' life. Resolutions fill my sails with life, drive, and ambition. And I sit here writing - alive, excited, and expectant for 2008.
But all of this is null and void without one underlying fact. I'm reminded that "So now faith, hope, and love abide, but the greatest of these is love." (1 Cor. 13:13)
So here's my underlying resolution for 2008, the rest is simply white noise: May it be in my life in 2008 that I be a man full of reckless, unconditional, and deep love - for my family, for my friends, for Christ, and all things that He loves.
Happy New Year.
Monday, December 31, 2007
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Thoughts on adventure
Hello faithful readers. I hope you're having a pleasant "post Christmas" gorging fest on food and relaxation. Perhaps you're working and working out and eating well. Hello to you folks too. I, for one, am gaining weight, sleeping in, and enjoying much time with my boys and my inlaws. This break has given me more time to write as well. So, forgive my latest bout of the blogging "runs." Just read, and do your best to stay awake.
I finished reading "Into the Wild" by Krakauer and highly recommend it for anyone interested in a story that is equally heart stirring, terrifying, and gut wrenching. A brief synopsis: Chris McCandless graduates from Emory University in Atlanta, GA, promptly gives his $25,000 inheritance to OXFAM, jumps in his car, and disappears. He later abandones his car, and hitchhikes around the country, finally following his dream to Alaska - just north of Mt. McKinley. There, he is discovered 3 weeks after his death by a moose hunter - emaciated and alone in an abandoned bus.
I tell you the synopsis because my sister did the same to me and it took nothing away from reading the book. Read it.
At any rate, I'm stirred at the conclusion of this book. Many many things stuck out to me from this book but the larger (at this point) issue is one of adventure. Something about the radical life McCandless led is strangely intoxicating. The adventures he embarked on are somewhat captivating to my mind and heart - and so I sit stirred. Adventure, it seems, is lost amidst the daily grind. You, my readers, have no doubt heard that sentiment expressed as I fumble through stretches of life, longing for deeper meaning and life to the full. Adventure, I'm convinced, has nothing to do with necessarily heading into the wild; seeking some type of transcendent, life giving message that wilderness gives. John Eldredge argues that men find adventure getting out of the cities, and returning to their "wild" roots up in the mountains. And I, for a time in my life, believed him wholeheartedly... lucky for me,I lived in Colorado at the time. And while I do believe that Eldredge says much that is true, I have since moved to the flatlands of the midwest, which has changed my tune. How is any man supposed to be wild when they live 600+ miles from "the wild"? Adventure has to be found somewhere else.
A couple of quotes at the end of the book summed up a lot for me. One is a quote from Annie Dillard:
"...when we wake to the deep shores of time uncreated, when the dazzling dark breaks over the far slopes of time, then it's time to toss things, like our reason and our will; then it's time to break our necks for home. There are no events but thoughts and the heart's hard turning, the heart's slow learning, where to love and whom. The rest is merely gossip, and tales for other times."
This stirring of course has nothing to do with me just giving it all away and disappearing. I want nothing to do with the hitchhiking, hunting, dying of starvation in Alaska, shunning all friends and family.... at the conclusion of "Into the Wild", it's clear that McCandless had changed his tune. In his journal toward the end of his life notes that happiness is only real when shared with others. And so, the longing for me is one of the adventure of sharing life with you: my friends and family.
"...where to love and whom." This is the adventure - this is truly what matters.
I'd urge you all to do the same: love unconditionally, fully, without question, and with abandon. Life together, under Christ: amidst pain, suffering, joy, laughter, hard times, good times - true adventure. I'm happy to be on this journey with you all.
I finished reading "Into the Wild" by Krakauer and highly recommend it for anyone interested in a story that is equally heart stirring, terrifying, and gut wrenching. A brief synopsis: Chris McCandless graduates from Emory University in Atlanta, GA, promptly gives his $25,000 inheritance to OXFAM, jumps in his car, and disappears. He later abandones his car, and hitchhikes around the country, finally following his dream to Alaska - just north of Mt. McKinley. There, he is discovered 3 weeks after his death by a moose hunter - emaciated and alone in an abandoned bus.
I tell you the synopsis because my sister did the same to me and it took nothing away from reading the book. Read it.
At any rate, I'm stirred at the conclusion of this book. Many many things stuck out to me from this book but the larger (at this point) issue is one of adventure. Something about the radical life McCandless led is strangely intoxicating. The adventures he embarked on are somewhat captivating to my mind and heart - and so I sit stirred. Adventure, it seems, is lost amidst the daily grind. You, my readers, have no doubt heard that sentiment expressed as I fumble through stretches of life, longing for deeper meaning and life to the full. Adventure, I'm convinced, has nothing to do with necessarily heading into the wild; seeking some type of transcendent, life giving message that wilderness gives. John Eldredge argues that men find adventure getting out of the cities, and returning to their "wild" roots up in the mountains. And I, for a time in my life, believed him wholeheartedly... lucky for me,I lived in Colorado at the time. And while I do believe that Eldredge says much that is true, I have since moved to the flatlands of the midwest, which has changed my tune. How is any man supposed to be wild when they live 600+ miles from "the wild"? Adventure has to be found somewhere else.
A couple of quotes at the end of the book summed up a lot for me. One is a quote from Annie Dillard:
"...when we wake to the deep shores of time uncreated, when the dazzling dark breaks over the far slopes of time, then it's time to toss things, like our reason and our will; then it's time to break our necks for home. There are no events but thoughts and the heart's hard turning, the heart's slow learning, where to love and whom. The rest is merely gossip, and tales for other times."
This stirring of course has nothing to do with me just giving it all away and disappearing. I want nothing to do with the hitchhiking, hunting, dying of starvation in Alaska, shunning all friends and family.... at the conclusion of "Into the Wild", it's clear that McCandless had changed his tune. In his journal toward the end of his life notes that happiness is only real when shared with others. And so, the longing for me is one of the adventure of sharing life with you: my friends and family.
"...where to love and whom." This is the adventure - this is truly what matters.
I'd urge you all to do the same: love unconditionally, fully, without question, and with abandon. Life together, under Christ: amidst pain, suffering, joy, laughter, hard times, good times - true adventure. I'm happy to be on this journey with you all.
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
Thoughts on questions
At a certain point in one's blog "career" (probably after your profile gets 250 views. . . .even if 189 of them are yourself checking how many people have checked your profile. . .but I digress), you go back through your posts from beginning until present time; taking stock of where you've come from. My faithful blog readers, it has been some kind of journey throughout the months. We've shared laughs, tears, and comments. I feel like I am now more popular because of the blog. And that, friends, is the reason I do it. What better way on this Christmas to reflect on my blogging history. . . .
I took a trip down memory lane. I traveled far back. . .to earlier in 2007. Okay, I haven't blogged for too long. But, I have done enough to know that my heart isn't consistent from post to post. I'm not that "steady" guy who proceeds through life with caution, guarding his heart from the ups and downs that come daily. Instead, my mood seems to change from post to post. One moment, I sound like a DJ from the local Christian radio station: "you know, God is awesome. Amen? Let's listen to some more positive music. . . here's mac powell. . . .". The next moment, I might make people feel like they feel after watching Life is Beautiful, Old Yeller, or worse - a full episode of According to Jim. Depressing.
I admit, I am a maze of emotion - even if it shows very little outwardly. In my heart, I alternately feel like a 15 year old kid who has no idea who he is; and a confident man who knows who he is in Christ, ready to turn the world upside down with hope. Much of the time, it seems to me like everyone else has it more together than I do; yet at the same time, I catch myself judging - finding it so easy to think how much better I am at life than others. It's total bullcrap, no doubt. I'm double minded - so no doubt that Paul wrote that he doesn't do what he wants to do, he does what he doesn't want to do. I also have recently caught myself thinking that if there are two really fat people that sit net to each other on an airplane, will it throw us off course? Probably. . . but that's wicked.
But, besides my wild mood swings, crazy thoughts, and my self analyzing, boredom-inducing writing style, I noticed a larger trend. My thinking has steadily grown consistently darker, consistently less hopeful, and consistently less about the Kingdom - more about me. Even if that hasn't shown outwardly (for instance, if you haven't noticed), I feel it. And I am tempted to believe that that darkened state of mind is about me not doing something right. Have I sinned in some way, thus throwing me into a spiral downward? Have I shamed the Lord? Have I lost His favor, thereby throwing me into a valley of darker thoughts? Do I need to support more of this Christianese culture in order to gain God's approval? Sounds like a stupid question - but it does cross my mind.
Nothing can separate us from the love of Christ - I believe that with all of my heart. So what else can it be?
Could it be that I've seen glimpses of the religious system I subscribe to that are less than perfect? Could I be learning that Christian life truly isn't "positive and encouraging" all of the time? Could I be right in the palm of His hand, even now? Could He be the one leading me this direction?
So I question, I ponder, I reflect, and I celebrate this Christmastime. Because despite my darkened state of mind toward some things, I love the Lord Jesus. And without this day, there'd be truly no hope.
Merry Christmas everyone. I love you all dearly - you're truly all gifts to me.
I took a trip down memory lane. I traveled far back. . .to earlier in 2007. Okay, I haven't blogged for too long. But, I have done enough to know that my heart isn't consistent from post to post. I'm not that "steady" guy who proceeds through life with caution, guarding his heart from the ups and downs that come daily. Instead, my mood seems to change from post to post. One moment, I sound like a DJ from the local Christian radio station: "you know, God is awesome. Amen? Let's listen to some more positive music. . . here's mac powell. . . .". The next moment, I might make people feel like they feel after watching Life is Beautiful, Old Yeller, or worse - a full episode of According to Jim. Depressing.
I admit, I am a maze of emotion - even if it shows very little outwardly. In my heart, I alternately feel like a 15 year old kid who has no idea who he is; and a confident man who knows who he is in Christ, ready to turn the world upside down with hope. Much of the time, it seems to me like everyone else has it more together than I do; yet at the same time, I catch myself judging - finding it so easy to think how much better I am at life than others. It's total bullcrap, no doubt. I'm double minded - so no doubt that Paul wrote that he doesn't do what he wants to do, he does what he doesn't want to do. I also have recently caught myself thinking that if there are two really fat people that sit net to each other on an airplane, will it throw us off course? Probably. . . but that's wicked.
But, besides my wild mood swings, crazy thoughts, and my self analyzing, boredom-inducing writing style, I noticed a larger trend. My thinking has steadily grown consistently darker, consistently less hopeful, and consistently less about the Kingdom - more about me. Even if that hasn't shown outwardly (for instance, if you haven't noticed), I feel it. And I am tempted to believe that that darkened state of mind is about me not doing something right. Have I sinned in some way, thus throwing me into a spiral downward? Have I shamed the Lord? Have I lost His favor, thereby throwing me into a valley of darker thoughts? Do I need to support more of this Christianese culture in order to gain God's approval? Sounds like a stupid question - but it does cross my mind.
Nothing can separate us from the love of Christ - I believe that with all of my heart. So what else can it be?
Could it be that I've seen glimpses of the religious system I subscribe to that are less than perfect? Could I be learning that Christian life truly isn't "positive and encouraging" all of the time? Could I be right in the palm of His hand, even now? Could He be the one leading me this direction?
So I question, I ponder, I reflect, and I celebrate this Christmastime. Because despite my darkened state of mind toward some things, I love the Lord Jesus. And without this day, there'd be truly no hope.
Merry Christmas everyone. I love you all dearly - you're truly all gifts to me.
Sunday, December 23, 2007
Thoughts on New York
What can I say about New York City? How would one describe something so large? How does one begin to express the feeling you get when surrounded by millions of individual lives, billions of office/retail/livable square footage, and more languages spoken than I could have ever imagined hearing (let alone, hearing them in one location)?
What do you say, then, when you go from the wide-open space of the Midwest and are dropped straight into the Mecca of American diversity? How are you supposed to feel when you have to hire a car service to get to and from the airport? How do you cope when the only pieces of nature you see are fenced off, that the grass is designated: “No dogs allowed” and that the trees are there, seemingly, to more beautifully frame the main attractions: the buildings?
How do you fathom the amount of money it takes to simply function; to get anywhere, to eat, to be entertained? How can one person fathom how much it costs to rent a tiny apartment, and yet how many people do? How much money does Bloomingdales make in one day at Christmas time? Macy’s? Anthropologie?
How should you feel when you hear people SCREAMING at each other from across the subway platform? (in a heavy Brooklyn accent: “YOU DISGUST ME, IN EVERY WHICH WAY. . . .”) What do you say when you are thrust into an area where people have less patience than my kids do on Christmas morning? How does a guy raised in a small town in Colorado respond when someone causes a 15 second delay for an automobile, gets honked at twice, and then the car stops, rolls down its windows and proceeds to yell at the elderly woman who caused the delay? How should I feel when one sees lots of young, able bodied guys relaxing in seats on the subway while women (some elderly) and children are forced to stand? How does one get used to shouldering women out of your way when trying to walk the streets, not apologizing, and not feeling bad?
And can I even begin to imagine the feelings of the new immigrants who initially stood on Ellis Island? What does it feel like to a new immigrant now? What is it like to find a job in New York, let alone which direction is north?
How do kids feel being raised in the projects? How do they feel being raised in posh Manhattan estates? Will they ever know how sweet air at 9000 feet smells or what it’s like to drive your very own automobile for 12 straight hours before reaching your destination? Will they ever be lulled to sleep by the quiet chirping of crickets? Will they ever see the Milky Way? And how do teachers in New York do it, while their students are pent up and “roped in” continually and have nowhere to go run and play? How do parents do it if their yard is nothing more than a 6-foot by 8-foot concrete slab?
How do tourists feel when they behold the majesty of Times Square for the first time? How do I respond to television screens that are 8 STORIES tall, and they are EVERYWHERE?! How does a tourist, if they have no tour guide, branch out any farther than just that area of the city? How do you absorb the entire breadth of the stimuli in that two block area? How do companies afford an advertisement that is that large? What does a model feel like to see themselves blown up to 80 feet tall?
How does a resident of New York meet new people? How would a single person go about finding companionship? How do you even trust another person in a city that large? How do churches form and grow? How does one interact with so many devout people from other religions?
What do you say when you see puddles of pee randomly on the sidewalks? What about the post Friday/Saturday night piles of vomit just randomly on the sidewalks/subway platforms? Can one get used to the rats… and the smells? Is it possible to get used to most public restrooms being filthy, without toilet paper, cramped, and crowded? How about the higher prices at restaurants?
How will I ever eat another Gyro again without comparing it to the “real thing” I had in Astoria? Will I ever again try a hot dog as good as a Gray’s Papaya frank? And the bacon-corn chowder at Gray Dog, how can I go without it? New York bagels are incomparable to any I’ve ever had, so how can I go back to the regular Panera bagels? Will I ever again see a Christmas tree as beautiful as the one at 30 Rock? Will I ever again feel as deeply in the Christmas spirit as I did while ice-skating in Central Park with my wife and my friends? Will I ever be in a place that diverse again? Will I ever be in a place again where almost nobody is fat?
How does one deal with New York for the first time?
You dive in head first – live it, love it, breathe it in, and thank God for every single bit of it. . . .
What do you say, then, when you go from the wide-open space of the Midwest and are dropped straight into the Mecca of American diversity? How are you supposed to feel when you have to hire a car service to get to and from the airport? How do you cope when the only pieces of nature you see are fenced off, that the grass is designated: “No dogs allowed” and that the trees are there, seemingly, to more beautifully frame the main attractions: the buildings?
How do you fathom the amount of money it takes to simply function; to get anywhere, to eat, to be entertained? How can one person fathom how much it costs to rent a tiny apartment, and yet how many people do? How much money does Bloomingdales make in one day at Christmas time? Macy’s? Anthropologie?
How should you feel when you hear people SCREAMING at each other from across the subway platform? (in a heavy Brooklyn accent: “YOU DISGUST ME, IN EVERY WHICH WAY. . . .”) What do you say when you are thrust into an area where people have less patience than my kids do on Christmas morning? How does a guy raised in a small town in Colorado respond when someone causes a 15 second delay for an automobile, gets honked at twice, and then the car stops, rolls down its windows and proceeds to yell at the elderly woman who caused the delay? How should I feel when one sees lots of young, able bodied guys relaxing in seats on the subway while women (some elderly) and children are forced to stand? How does one get used to shouldering women out of your way when trying to walk the streets, not apologizing, and not feeling bad?
And can I even begin to imagine the feelings of the new immigrants who initially stood on Ellis Island? What does it feel like to a new immigrant now? What is it like to find a job in New York, let alone which direction is north?
How do kids feel being raised in the projects? How do they feel being raised in posh Manhattan estates? Will they ever know how sweet air at 9000 feet smells or what it’s like to drive your very own automobile for 12 straight hours before reaching your destination? Will they ever be lulled to sleep by the quiet chirping of crickets? Will they ever see the Milky Way? And how do teachers in New York do it, while their students are pent up and “roped in” continually and have nowhere to go run and play? How do parents do it if their yard is nothing more than a 6-foot by 8-foot concrete slab?
How do tourists feel when they behold the majesty of Times Square for the first time? How do I respond to television screens that are 8 STORIES tall, and they are EVERYWHERE?! How does a tourist, if they have no tour guide, branch out any farther than just that area of the city? How do you absorb the entire breadth of the stimuli in that two block area? How do companies afford an advertisement that is that large? What does a model feel like to see themselves blown up to 80 feet tall?
How does a resident of New York meet new people? How would a single person go about finding companionship? How do you even trust another person in a city that large? How do churches form and grow? How does one interact with so many devout people from other religions?
What do you say when you see puddles of pee randomly on the sidewalks? What about the post Friday/Saturday night piles of vomit just randomly on the sidewalks/subway platforms? Can one get used to the rats… and the smells? Is it possible to get used to most public restrooms being filthy, without toilet paper, cramped, and crowded? How about the higher prices at restaurants?
How will I ever eat another Gyro again without comparing it to the “real thing” I had in Astoria? Will I ever again try a hot dog as good as a Gray’s Papaya frank? And the bacon-corn chowder at Gray Dog, how can I go without it? New York bagels are incomparable to any I’ve ever had, so how can I go back to the regular Panera bagels? Will I ever again see a Christmas tree as beautiful as the one at 30 Rock? Will I ever again feel as deeply in the Christmas spirit as I did while ice-skating in Central Park with my wife and my friends? Will I ever be in a place that diverse again? Will I ever be in a place again where almost nobody is fat?
How does one deal with New York for the first time?
You dive in head first – live it, love it, breathe it in, and thank God for every single bit of it. . . .
Monday, December 10, 2007
Thoughts on Hamburgers. . . .those bastards
I'm up at quarter til one blogging. . . . so immediately you know something isn't right with me.
Let me take you back two nights.
Ashley and I sat in our office - both of us at our corresponding workstations, discussing our business and some things for the future. The kids were down to bed so this was our time to dream and our time to brainstorm.
And I heard a cough from the boys' room, didn't think much of it at first, and went to investigate.
"Tyler are you okay?"
(response is crying)
I gently pick up Tyler.
"What's the matter buddy?"
(vomit sprays all over my shirt)
So as Ashley cleaned the floors and sheets. I held him and consoled him and gave him a bath. It, at the time, was wonderful. He whimpered things like "I love you daddy" which, for any non-parent out there - please trust that it is the absolute greatest feeling on earth.
Anyways, Sunday came and went. Tyler didn't throw up, ate a good dinner, as did micah.
Monday came and went. I went to work, had a good day, and all was fairly good at home when I was driving home. I spoke with Ashley at 4:10-4:15 before she had to console crying dudes.
So, no worries, right? I'm going home to be with my family, the ice storm is moving in but we'll be safe and warm inside, right?
Wrong.
I arrived home to 2 sick children, puking all over the floor. It was chaos and my poor wife was cleaning all of it. Phew, at least I and her both don't have it!
Or not. We ordered two cheeseburgers from a local bar and grille and I picked them up without incident (with some sprite for the kiddos). Arriving home, we ate our burgers amidst vomiting children and just shook our heads at the crazy moment we were living out.
And promptly after dinner, I threw up. . .and up. . .and up. . .and up. . .and up (plus a couple more) within a 4 hour span.
And I have NEVER been as sick as I am right now - never. It is truly unreal.
So, I hate hamburgers, the little bastard food group that they are.
But, it's strange how being sick has made me realize how much better I have it than some though. I'm still inside on an ice-storm night. I am well fed, unlike many (as was, um, plenty evident tonight). And I have an incredible caring wife who has nurtured my boys and I. Pray that I don't get her sick. So, I sit and sip water, now wanting to lay down until it's been absorbed.
I hate the flu. I hate hamburgers.
Let me take you back two nights.
Ashley and I sat in our office - both of us at our corresponding workstations, discussing our business and some things for the future. The kids were down to bed so this was our time to dream and our time to brainstorm.
And I heard a cough from the boys' room, didn't think much of it at first, and went to investigate.
"Tyler are you okay?"
(response is crying)
I gently pick up Tyler.
"What's the matter buddy?"
(vomit sprays all over my shirt)
So as Ashley cleaned the floors and sheets. I held him and consoled him and gave him a bath. It, at the time, was wonderful. He whimpered things like "I love you daddy" which, for any non-parent out there - please trust that it is the absolute greatest feeling on earth.
Anyways, Sunday came and went. Tyler didn't throw up, ate a good dinner, as did micah.
Monday came and went. I went to work, had a good day, and all was fairly good at home when I was driving home. I spoke with Ashley at 4:10-4:15 before she had to console crying dudes.
So, no worries, right? I'm going home to be with my family, the ice storm is moving in but we'll be safe and warm inside, right?
Wrong.
I arrived home to 2 sick children, puking all over the floor. It was chaos and my poor wife was cleaning all of it. Phew, at least I and her both don't have it!
Or not. We ordered two cheeseburgers from a local bar and grille and I picked them up without incident (with some sprite for the kiddos). Arriving home, we ate our burgers amidst vomiting children and just shook our heads at the crazy moment we were living out.
And promptly after dinner, I threw up. . .and up. . .and up. . .and up. . .and up (plus a couple more) within a 4 hour span.
And I have NEVER been as sick as I am right now - never. It is truly unreal.
So, I hate hamburgers, the little bastard food group that they are.
But, it's strange how being sick has made me realize how much better I have it than some though. I'm still inside on an ice-storm night. I am well fed, unlike many (as was, um, plenty evident tonight). And I have an incredible caring wife who has nurtured my boys and I. Pray that I don't get her sick. So, I sit and sip water, now wanting to lay down until it's been absorbed.
I hate the flu. I hate hamburgers.
Saturday, December 8, 2007
Thoughts on inspiration
Well, now that I've crossed the "10 comments" barrier in the blogging universe, I am progressing on to new dimensions of self esteem and popularity. After all, isn't that what blogs are all about? "I'll show you how awesome I am, and you guys,therefore, like me more." Yeah - I do have awesome pet peeves. So thanks - I feel good.
Truth be told, I am finding that I'm running out of things to blog about lately. I mean, how do I stay fresh? How do I "one up" myself? I mean, have you read the blogs I've posted in the past months? They are incredible. And, now that I am rocking this universe so deeply, I feel like this is my contribution to society.
But therein lies the problem - how do you keep going? Do I keep a running journal entry of my daily events?
"So today was AWESOME! (LOL). I got to go to WORK! (LOL) And I got to stand in the freezing ass cold weather!! (ROTFL!!) And THEN, I got YELLED AT by the "Smithers" of the company!! HOORAY!"
After about 10 straight posts like the above, I know that the interest in this blog would run out faster than Britney Spears' moral compass, or copies of the new Third Day CD at the Family Christian stores. I don't know what it is called, but I'm sure it's worth more to Jesus than Myrhh or whatever.
I need new inspiration to keep you guys well fed at the feeding trough of blogging wisdom. I would like nothing more than to fill this trough with hilarious anecdotes daily, giving each and every one of you new vision and encouragement for the day, healing marriages and diseases, and bringing home the troops for Christmas. . . .
But alas, you're stuck with "just my thoughts" which neither cure cancer (or bum hips), save marriages, or even shed tears (unless they're tears of shame over how I write).
Knowing this, I'm looking for more inspiration throughout life so that I can keep your insatiable appetites fed. And truth be told, I was getting a little bit tired of ripping on church and Christian music. And yes, as God often does, He seems to have intervened into my life, providing me with fresh wind and fresh fire - giving me drive to blog yet again and freshly reveal my thoughts into your souls.
And, sorry, they're still about Christian music and church. And here we go again.
See, we just found out we got about 6 new channels via our rabbit ears on our television. . . and as God works, one of them is the "worship" channel - where Jeremy's blog inspiration flows freely out of the tube and into my soul. In an evening of flipping through channels, I saw:
-Michael W.
-Avalon
-Third Day
-Carman
Holy crap, inspiration is back. And I'm so grateful.
And as I watched the infomercial (in shock, disbelief and some shame) for "Songs 4 Life" ("some of the greatest Christian music ever", hosted by Michael W.), a clip of my favorite band Avalon came up as they passionately sang "Testify to Love". And they did their little synchronized hand raising and passionately "got down" to the song while dressed nicely in front of a large, caucasian middle class audience. . . .like all Christian musicians do. I horked in my mouth. . . .but swallowed it down. I'm better now.
Christian musicians reveal more about the gospel to me than almost anything else. I watched this little commercial - and, completely judgmentally, I thought to myself: "if they weren't outfitted with nice clothes, and if nobody came to that concert, would they still sing the same lyrics to the song?"
In other words, I just find it hard to believe a lot of Christian musicians in their witness for Christ. I don't trust them, because I'm living a faith that is at times not strong. I still struggle with stuff. I believe in Jesus and want to follow Him - but it's made difficult when I don't always like myself, I don't always treat my family well, I get discouraged and lose sight of Christ. So as they sing their inspirational Christian music, I say "the heck with this crap" because life just isn't that cheery all the time. Testify to love? Seriously? "OF COURSE you testify to love" I think to myself. "You are wealthy and famous and celebrated by a large group of people that paid money to come hear you sing!" Testify to getting cussed out. Testify to nights of little sleep. Testify to letting your kids down and messing up as a dad and husband.
Where is my heart in all of this? Dealing with a degree of discouragement. I need Christ, because the Christian life isn't always happy and glitzy and shiny. And that being said - it's the only place where hope is found, where life is found, where encouragement is found, where love is found. And despite my failings - the dark valleys in life - there's still no place I would rather be than following Jesus. But I'll follow Him without "Songs 4 Life".
Truth be told, I am finding that I'm running out of things to blog about lately. I mean, how do I stay fresh? How do I "one up" myself? I mean, have you read the blogs I've posted in the past months? They are incredible. And, now that I am rocking this universe so deeply, I feel like this is my contribution to society.
But therein lies the problem - how do you keep going? Do I keep a running journal entry of my daily events?
"So today was AWESOME! (LOL). I got to go to WORK! (LOL) And I got to stand in the freezing ass cold weather!! (ROTFL!!) And THEN, I got YELLED AT by the "Smithers" of the company!! HOORAY!"
After about 10 straight posts like the above, I know that the interest in this blog would run out faster than Britney Spears' moral compass, or copies of the new Third Day CD at the Family Christian stores. I don't know what it is called, but I'm sure it's worth more to Jesus than Myrhh or whatever.
I need new inspiration to keep you guys well fed at the feeding trough of blogging wisdom. I would like nothing more than to fill this trough with hilarious anecdotes daily, giving each and every one of you new vision and encouragement for the day, healing marriages and diseases, and bringing home the troops for Christmas. . . .
But alas, you're stuck with "just my thoughts" which neither cure cancer (or bum hips), save marriages, or even shed tears (unless they're tears of shame over how I write).
Knowing this, I'm looking for more inspiration throughout life so that I can keep your insatiable appetites fed. And truth be told, I was getting a little bit tired of ripping on church and Christian music. And yes, as God often does, He seems to have intervened into my life, providing me with fresh wind and fresh fire - giving me drive to blog yet again and freshly reveal my thoughts into your souls.
And, sorry, they're still about Christian music and church. And here we go again.
See, we just found out we got about 6 new channels via our rabbit ears on our television. . . and as God works, one of them is the "worship" channel - where Jeremy's blog inspiration flows freely out of the tube and into my soul. In an evening of flipping through channels, I saw:
-Michael W.
-Avalon
-Third Day
-Carman
Holy crap, inspiration is back. And I'm so grateful.
And as I watched the infomercial (in shock, disbelief and some shame) for "Songs 4 Life" ("some of the greatest Christian music ever", hosted by Michael W.), a clip of my favorite band Avalon came up as they passionately sang "Testify to Love". And they did their little synchronized hand raising and passionately "got down" to the song while dressed nicely in front of a large, caucasian middle class audience. . . .like all Christian musicians do. I horked in my mouth. . . .but swallowed it down. I'm better now.
Christian musicians reveal more about the gospel to me than almost anything else. I watched this little commercial - and, completely judgmentally, I thought to myself: "if they weren't outfitted with nice clothes, and if nobody came to that concert, would they still sing the same lyrics to the song?"
In other words, I just find it hard to believe a lot of Christian musicians in their witness for Christ. I don't trust them, because I'm living a faith that is at times not strong. I still struggle with stuff. I believe in Jesus and want to follow Him - but it's made difficult when I don't always like myself, I don't always treat my family well, I get discouraged and lose sight of Christ. So as they sing their inspirational Christian music, I say "the heck with this crap" because life just isn't that cheery all the time. Testify to love? Seriously? "OF COURSE you testify to love" I think to myself. "You are wealthy and famous and celebrated by a large group of people that paid money to come hear you sing!" Testify to getting cussed out. Testify to nights of little sleep. Testify to letting your kids down and messing up as a dad and husband.
Where is my heart in all of this? Dealing with a degree of discouragement. I need Christ, because the Christian life isn't always happy and glitzy and shiny. And that being said - it's the only place where hope is found, where life is found, where encouragement is found, where love is found. And despite my failings - the dark valleys in life - there's still no place I would rather be than following Jesus. But I'll follow Him without "Songs 4 Life".
Monday, December 3, 2007
Thoughts on my pet peeves
What are your pet peeves, blog readers? I'm here to be a sounding board so you can vent.
-The Spice Girls, Black Eyed Peas/Fergie, and Paula Cole (Dawson's Creek theme song).
-People that say "melk" or "worsh"
-Getting stuck at red lights, while nobody is going the other direction.
-Worship songs that mention "dancing", yet inspire no dancing. This, um, happened 2 times in one service on Sunday in Washington. To think about the congregation in the pews dancing to the music. . . . unintentional comedy. (Oh I feel like dancing". . . .and Jeremy doesn't)
-Christmas songs that mention such time-honored traditions such as "Scary ghost stories and tales of the glories of Christmas's long long ago"
-Big bites of food with dog hair in them
-Random blog posts. . . .(oh crap)
-The Spice Girls, Black Eyed Peas/Fergie, and Paula Cole (Dawson's Creek theme song).
-People that say "melk" or "worsh"
-Getting stuck at red lights, while nobody is going the other direction.
-Worship songs that mention "dancing", yet inspire no dancing. This, um, happened 2 times in one service on Sunday in Washington. To think about the congregation in the pews dancing to the music. . . . unintentional comedy. (Oh I feel like dancing". . . .and Jeremy doesn't)
-Christmas songs that mention such time-honored traditions such as "Scary ghost stories and tales of the glories of Christmas's long long ago"
-Big bites of food with dog hair in them
-Random blog posts. . . .(oh crap)
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Thoughts on construction workers
Due to a startling lack of things to watch on television this evening, I am blogging yet again. The "just my thoughts" mentality drives me to do so. I do have thoughts, and though this is "just" them, I feel it necessary to bestow them onto the world wide web (www) for you to partake of one more time.
So, I worked today which was long and difficult. When you're not very good at what you do (as in, you've never done this before), and you work with people that are demanding - things can get tense. But, in the midst of the tension, I started thinking about construction workers.
Construction workers are an interesting dichotomy (sp?) of good and bad things. They are stereotyped as being immoral slackers that can't do anything else to be productive in society. #1 - I resent that. #2 - it is in large part true.
Truth is, I don't consider myself a construction worker. At least, I'm not a career construction worker (I've done other stuff outside of construction.) So as I listen to those whom I consider to be "career construction workers", I ponder their lives.
The good things:
-Construction workers love to get the job done right. They do not do anything half assed - at least the guys I work with.
-Construction workers demand excellence in their job performance and admit mistakes when they've made them (and, having been a part of corporate life before - I can tell you that they have more integrity this way than most people at Midland Loan Services - yack)
-Construction workers work well in teams.
-Construction workers are extremely generous with all they have.
The bad things:
-Construction workers gossip like little 8th grade girls. . . .all the time. Every conversation involves gossip about another worker, another job, the boss, the job site, whatever. . . .it's worse than "Mean Girls." "Mean Dirty Old Construction Workers" could be the sequel.
-Construction workers all think that they should be the boss. Everyone - EVERYONE - has their own unique opinion about how things should be done, what needs to happen RIGHT NOW, and how the person in charge just isn't doing it correctly.
-Construction workers all like to brown nose with their boss. BUT if they see another person brown nosing, they rip on him. For example, my boss said to another worker today: "If so and so's boss stopped fast enough, that guy would end up with sh*t on his nose". Hilarity ensues - and all the while I'm thinking, "Everyone who just laughed at this stupid joke just ended up with sh*t on their noses."
-Construction workers are deeply flawed, deeply broken, and each one hurts and is probably clinically depressed - but would never admit it. Divorce, abuse, felonies, drugs, alcohol womanizing, etc. . . .and they are all open books about it.
Anyways - I don't mean to simply rip into them. Just observations from my day today. From their perspective toward me, I know they think "That idiot guy who doesn't know how to do anything out here." How very true they are.
And as broken as they are, as messed up as they are, as much as I do not ever want to dive into friendship with any of them, as much as they essentially repulse me, I read Mt. 5:3 -
"God blesses those who realize their need for him, for the Kingdom of Heaven is given to them." (New Living)
In the midst of the perpetual circus that is work alongside these men, I find small pockets of the Kingdom of Heaven. In a conversation with Mike, my coworker: smoker, drinker, borderline bi-polar (happy and then extremely angry), he recently said to me:
"I know I smoke and drink - but I know that I trust Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. Do you think God will let me into heaven?"
Me: "I do - absolutely."
I fly Saturday to Washington to be at my Grandfather's funeral. And he, a broken man in many ways, now sits with Christ Jesus forever, because he recognized his need for a Savior.
What a great God we serve.
So, I worked today which was long and difficult. When you're not very good at what you do (as in, you've never done this before), and you work with people that are demanding - things can get tense. But, in the midst of the tension, I started thinking about construction workers.
Construction workers are an interesting dichotomy (sp?) of good and bad things. They are stereotyped as being immoral slackers that can't do anything else to be productive in society. #1 - I resent that. #2 - it is in large part true.
Truth is, I don't consider myself a construction worker. At least, I'm not a career construction worker (I've done other stuff outside of construction.) So as I listen to those whom I consider to be "career construction workers", I ponder their lives.
The good things:
-Construction workers love to get the job done right. They do not do anything half assed - at least the guys I work with.
-Construction workers demand excellence in their job performance and admit mistakes when they've made them (and, having been a part of corporate life before - I can tell you that they have more integrity this way than most people at Midland Loan Services - yack)
-Construction workers work well in teams.
-Construction workers are extremely generous with all they have.
The bad things:
-Construction workers gossip like little 8th grade girls. . . .all the time. Every conversation involves gossip about another worker, another job, the boss, the job site, whatever. . . .it's worse than "Mean Girls." "Mean Dirty Old Construction Workers" could be the sequel.
-Construction workers all think that they should be the boss. Everyone - EVERYONE - has their own unique opinion about how things should be done, what needs to happen RIGHT NOW, and how the person in charge just isn't doing it correctly.
-Construction workers all like to brown nose with their boss. BUT if they see another person brown nosing, they rip on him. For example, my boss said to another worker today: "If so and so's boss stopped fast enough, that guy would end up with sh*t on his nose". Hilarity ensues - and all the while I'm thinking, "Everyone who just laughed at this stupid joke just ended up with sh*t on their noses."
-Construction workers are deeply flawed, deeply broken, and each one hurts and is probably clinically depressed - but would never admit it. Divorce, abuse, felonies, drugs, alcohol womanizing, etc. . . .and they are all open books about it.
Anyways - I don't mean to simply rip into them. Just observations from my day today. From their perspective toward me, I know they think "That idiot guy who doesn't know how to do anything out here." How very true they are.
And as broken as they are, as messed up as they are, as much as I do not ever want to dive into friendship with any of them, as much as they essentially repulse me, I read Mt. 5:3 -
"God blesses those who realize their need for him, for the Kingdom of Heaven is given to them." (New Living)
In the midst of the perpetual circus that is work alongside these men, I find small pockets of the Kingdom of Heaven. In a conversation with Mike, my coworker: smoker, drinker, borderline bi-polar (happy and then extremely angry), he recently said to me:
"I know I smoke and drink - but I know that I trust Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. Do you think God will let me into heaven?"
Me: "I do - absolutely."
I fly Saturday to Washington to be at my Grandfather's funeral. And he, a broken man in many ways, now sits with Christ Jesus forever, because he recognized his need for a Savior.
What a great God we serve.
Sunday, November 25, 2007
Thoughts on breaking
I am at the dubious point in life where one's youth begins to be called into question. I have a good friend who has a bum hip. I have a friend who is worth millions. I have friends who have traveled to Asia, Europe, the Middle East (currently), AND Kansas City within the past 5 years. I am unable to sleep past 7:00 AM anymore. And yet, I am not in my 60's. I am 27. And my 10 year high school reunion is arriving soon. Yes, I truly am getting old.
And so I sit and think about my high school "career." Let me paint a picture in your mind:
A five foot, eleven inch dude with a hairstyle that screams "who cares?!" and a belly that screams "more cereal!!" A trombone case in his hand. A backpack slung over one shoulder. Determination in his eyes, and love in his heart.
High school. Sigh. . . .now that we've established that not much has changed since high school, let's move on.
My sister Annie has recently seen several of her old classmates - not anyone who was super close to her in school, but acquaintances/friends nonetheless. And I've started wondering where people are at. Who's successful? Who lives with their parents and plays video games in the basement all day? Did Jimmy marry Sally? Yes! And they got divorced! Great!
But where am I at? Since high school, where have I come from? Perhaps it's the end of the year that draws out the small degree of introspection that I have. Perhaps it's the fact that I have a four year old son now (no longer a baby, wow). Perhaps it's the death of a church service that meant more to me than I think even I know, and it hurts. Regardless, it's time to begin taking stock of life. Grown up? Me? I have no idea what that means.
I have no real career path which makes me wonder if I ever will. I have no real idea of what I'm capable of in life. I can't imagine what that would feel like - acquiring a skill that you are proud of. I have no idea what I'm good at in other words. And it doesn't help seeing everyone I know being an overachiever, or living dreams.
I have an amazing family life at home. THAT, at least, I know I can do well.
I have gone through highs and lows with Christ and am finding that right now, I am not at a high point. In the last of our worship services today, I could only find myself praying: "God, where are you? I don't know how to pray right now. I don't know how to repent for where I'm at." I'm burned out.
So who am I? And where do I go from here? I'm not who I want to be in so many ways. But, I'm breaking, and that's probably a good thing.
And so I sit and think about my high school "career." Let me paint a picture in your mind:
A five foot, eleven inch dude with a hairstyle that screams "who cares?!" and a belly that screams "more cereal!!" A trombone case in his hand. A backpack slung over one shoulder. Determination in his eyes, and love in his heart.
High school. Sigh. . . .now that we've established that not much has changed since high school, let's move on.
My sister Annie has recently seen several of her old classmates - not anyone who was super close to her in school, but acquaintances/friends nonetheless. And I've started wondering where people are at. Who's successful? Who lives with their parents and plays video games in the basement all day? Did Jimmy marry Sally? Yes! And they got divorced! Great!
But where am I at? Since high school, where have I come from? Perhaps it's the end of the year that draws out the small degree of introspection that I have. Perhaps it's the fact that I have a four year old son now (no longer a baby, wow). Perhaps it's the death of a church service that meant more to me than I think even I know, and it hurts. Regardless, it's time to begin taking stock of life. Grown up? Me? I have no idea what that means.
I have no real career path which makes me wonder if I ever will. I have no real idea of what I'm capable of in life. I can't imagine what that would feel like - acquiring a skill that you are proud of. I have no idea what I'm good at in other words. And it doesn't help seeing everyone I know being an overachiever, or living dreams.
I have an amazing family life at home. THAT, at least, I know I can do well.
I have gone through highs and lows with Christ and am finding that right now, I am not at a high point. In the last of our worship services today, I could only find myself praying: "God, where are you? I don't know how to pray right now. I don't know how to repent for where I'm at." I'm burned out.
So who am I? And where do I go from here? I'm not who I want to be in so many ways. But, I'm breaking, and that's probably a good thing.
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Thoughts on Thanksgiving (what? you were expecting Christmas?)
Ahhhh, thanksgiving. It's the "Diet Coke" of the Holidays. And, since I love to eat (take a good look at this blog-writer), I'd even consider this the "Diet Coke with lime" holiday. In other words - I love thanksgiving.
And, it's strange, but every Thanksgiving, I really get the sense that I need to be thinking about what I'm thankful for. I don't know, it's weird how it works, but sometimes I just feel like today would be a good day to give thanks. Maybe it comes from the root of the word "Thanksgiving."
Published author Jack Handy advocates that to truly understand the meaning of a word, you need to look at the root word origins that make up your new word. Handy states:
"Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words - "mank" and "ind". What do these words mean ? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind."
Handy is right, obviously.
Fortunately, thanksgiving is an easier topic than mankind. Giving thanks. . . .only reversed.
And so I wake up this morning giving thanks. Here are some things I'm thankful for, in no particular order.
I'm thankful for the Kansas City fall. I'm grateful for the orange leaves that now grace my driveway. I am grateful to see a few flurries of snow on the ground right now - especially since I am currently inside the house where it is warm. This will probably change on Monday when I'm outside. On Monday, I'm grateful for warm clothes.
I'm grateful for my kids. I'm grateful for Micah - now a 4 year old - and sharp as a tack. I'm grateful for the way he speaks so well, and enjoys doing so so much that he actually says words while he's breathing in. I'm grateful for the way he prays before dinner and bed time - how he loves people so much, how he cares about others' feelings, and how he gives everyone a chance - even the mean kids on the playgrounds (who will get nothing but coal this year. . . .the little bastards).
I'm grateful as well for Tyler. 2 and a half and a bundle of life and joy wherever he goes. I'm grateful for his sense of humor. I love laughing with him and seeing him make others laugh. I love that wherever he goes, he smiles, and he gives that smile to others. I love how much he loves his big brother - always - and how he is able to go into a room alone and play for hours, giving voice to each and every toy he plays with (almost always a very high pitched voice).
I love my wife and am grateful for her. And I don't want that to sound like a cliche, simply because we're married. I love her - truly and deeply. I love her heart, her wisdom, her looks, her laugh. I love seeing her come alive as a photography talent is grown. I love seeing her cuddle our kids. I love spending time with her more than anyone else, and alternately miss her whenever I'm not around her. I love that we've been married for 6 and a half years and that it doesn't feel old or stale; and I love being able to dream of the future with her. I love my wife. I love thinking about Thanksgivings with her for years.
I'm grateful for my family - both here and away. My mom and dad, all three sisters, Kent and Elizabeth - I am grateful for you all. I was blessed to be with my whole family for Thanksgiving this year. I have Christmas with Kent and Eliz to look forward to. I'm thankful for family - for years of memories building up to this Thanksgiving moment. I love knowing that there are more memories coming also. I tell you, it's weird to see your siblings all grown up.
I'm thankful for my friends. Even the ones who don't comment. I'm grateful and thank God for new life growing in Jane, and that Jerome is the man with skills - despite their blatant lack of commenting power (hi guys). I'm so thankful for them and their boys (and maybe a girl? probably not!)
I'm grateful for laughter bestowed upon me through my friends Tim and Krysten in Kuwait. Yes, Kuwait. I'm thankful for their insight into the world around them - truly talented people. Their blog is koehnoscopy.blogspot.com - go read it. Mostly, I'm grateful that I'm actually going to see them at Christmas time. Oh man, I'm grateful for that.
I'm grateful for the deep caring heart of Devon and Zak - I'm grateful how much they love my wife and I and our kids. I'm thankful that everything that makes me laugh - makes them laugh too. I love laughing with those guys. And I'm ultra grateful for my Christmas present. . . .an NYC trip in December. (are you freaking kidding me?) Thanks, and that hardly covers it.
I'm thankful for Sarah in mexico. I'm thankful for her heart to serve the Lord and how He has blessed her work down there. I'm thankful hearing about a special friend in her life. . . a boyfriend;) She also comments on the blog. I'm thankful.
I'm thankful for other old friends. But I'm so thankful for growing new friendships. The Walkers and Eubanks in particular - like family to us here. They have stood beside us in some difficult moments, and I love being able to stand beside them in the midst of life's trials also. Community is incredible. Watching Megan and Bret growing a child is incredible - watching Genny and Carol raise their newborn daughter is incredible. I love these guys.
Ok, this post could grow to epic lengths if I keep going. If you feel like I "left you out" - sorry. I probably did. Sheesh, stop crying!
The point is, I am cynical and pretty good at picking out life's problems and troubles and dwelling on those. I miss out on the little blessings around me as a result. But - I am thankful for you all - the people in my life. Be blessed today as you shop. Enjoy the zoo that is Christmas in America. You all make my life beautiful and I am grateful.
And, it's strange, but every Thanksgiving, I really get the sense that I need to be thinking about what I'm thankful for. I don't know, it's weird how it works, but sometimes I just feel like today would be a good day to give thanks. Maybe it comes from the root of the word "Thanksgiving."
Published author Jack Handy advocates that to truly understand the meaning of a word, you need to look at the root word origins that make up your new word. Handy states:
"Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words - "mank" and "ind". What do these words mean ? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind."
Handy is right, obviously.
Fortunately, thanksgiving is an easier topic than mankind. Giving thanks. . . .only reversed.
And so I wake up this morning giving thanks. Here are some things I'm thankful for, in no particular order.
I'm thankful for the Kansas City fall. I'm grateful for the orange leaves that now grace my driveway. I am grateful to see a few flurries of snow on the ground right now - especially since I am currently inside the house where it is warm. This will probably change on Monday when I'm outside. On Monday, I'm grateful for warm clothes.
I'm grateful for my kids. I'm grateful for Micah - now a 4 year old - and sharp as a tack. I'm grateful for the way he speaks so well, and enjoys doing so so much that he actually says words while he's breathing in. I'm grateful for the way he prays before dinner and bed time - how he loves people so much, how he cares about others' feelings, and how he gives everyone a chance - even the mean kids on the playgrounds (who will get nothing but coal this year. . . .the little bastards).
I'm grateful as well for Tyler. 2 and a half and a bundle of life and joy wherever he goes. I'm grateful for his sense of humor. I love laughing with him and seeing him make others laugh. I love that wherever he goes, he smiles, and he gives that smile to others. I love how much he loves his big brother - always - and how he is able to go into a room alone and play for hours, giving voice to each and every toy he plays with (almost always a very high pitched voice).
I love my wife and am grateful for her. And I don't want that to sound like a cliche, simply because we're married. I love her - truly and deeply. I love her heart, her wisdom, her looks, her laugh. I love seeing her come alive as a photography talent is grown. I love seeing her cuddle our kids. I love spending time with her more than anyone else, and alternately miss her whenever I'm not around her. I love that we've been married for 6 and a half years and that it doesn't feel old or stale; and I love being able to dream of the future with her. I love my wife. I love thinking about Thanksgivings with her for years.
I'm grateful for my family - both here and away. My mom and dad, all three sisters, Kent and Elizabeth - I am grateful for you all. I was blessed to be with my whole family for Thanksgiving this year. I have Christmas with Kent and Eliz to look forward to. I'm thankful for family - for years of memories building up to this Thanksgiving moment. I love knowing that there are more memories coming also. I tell you, it's weird to see your siblings all grown up.
I'm thankful for my friends. Even the ones who don't comment. I'm grateful and thank God for new life growing in Jane, and that Jerome is the man with skills - despite their blatant lack of commenting power (hi guys). I'm so thankful for them and their boys (and maybe a girl? probably not!)
I'm grateful for laughter bestowed upon me through my friends Tim and Krysten in Kuwait. Yes, Kuwait. I'm thankful for their insight into the world around them - truly talented people. Their blog is koehnoscopy.blogspot.com - go read it. Mostly, I'm grateful that I'm actually going to see them at Christmas time. Oh man, I'm grateful for that.
I'm grateful for the deep caring heart of Devon and Zak - I'm grateful how much they love my wife and I and our kids. I'm thankful that everything that makes me laugh - makes them laugh too. I love laughing with those guys. And I'm ultra grateful for my Christmas present. . . .an NYC trip in December. (are you freaking kidding me?) Thanks, and that hardly covers it.
I'm thankful for Sarah in mexico. I'm thankful for her heart to serve the Lord and how He has blessed her work down there. I'm thankful hearing about a special friend in her life. . . a boyfriend;) She also comments on the blog. I'm thankful.
I'm thankful for other old friends. But I'm so thankful for growing new friendships. The Walkers and Eubanks in particular - like family to us here. They have stood beside us in some difficult moments, and I love being able to stand beside them in the midst of life's trials also. Community is incredible. Watching Megan and Bret growing a child is incredible - watching Genny and Carol raise their newborn daughter is incredible. I love these guys.
Ok, this post could grow to epic lengths if I keep going. If you feel like I "left you out" - sorry. I probably did. Sheesh, stop crying!
The point is, I am cynical and pretty good at picking out life's problems and troubles and dwelling on those. I miss out on the little blessings around me as a result. But - I am thankful for you all - the people in my life. Be blessed today as you shop. Enjoy the zoo that is Christmas in America. You all make my life beautiful and I am grateful.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Thoughts on being sorry
I have deleted the couch post. For those who haven't read that post, don't ask. Not my proudest moment.
I'm sorry for glorifying something that was blatantly wrong. I've asked for forgiveness from Jesus and am asking Him to deal with my heart - break it, mold it, whatever.
Sigh. . . .onward.
JP
I'm sorry for glorifying something that was blatantly wrong. I've asked for forgiveness from Jesus and am asking Him to deal with my heart - break it, mold it, whatever.
Sigh. . . .onward.
JP
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Thoughts on worship
Let's move on from that last blog post. . . .can I have a mulligan? Probably shouldn't have glorified that event like I did. Sheesh, I'm pretty wretched sometimes. And this post will be no different. Buckle up.
Some stuff transpired on Sunday in our church service that has set off a wild set of events in my head. Basically, while attending a church meeting (awesome) after the service, I had a case of verbal diarhea, spewing forth months (and years) worth of pent up frustration and anger. And I now am left with the "what now" in the wake of it. The meeting had to do with the worship service that I've been leading worship at. And, as is the case with Christ, He seems to take great pleasure in using all events to teach and instruct, and help them to get to the bottom of where our hearts are now.
I was going on 4 and a half hours of sleep yesterday evening while driving to the grocery store up the hill. I got in the car, started it, turned left onto Meyer to settle in for my 25 second drive - and a thought occured to me.
"Hey, you know what would be great? A Christian American Idol!!"
And then, in the next 25 seconds, it played out in my head, and I have it all planned out. Here's a sample script:
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"Live, from COLORADO SPRINGS! It's AMERICAN CHRISTIAN IDOL!!!" (crowd made up of mostly youth group girls goes crazy)
"Tonight, we have our two FINALISTS in the running to see who rocks the hardest, sings the purest, and praises the holiest!! (crowd goes crazy) The winner gets a recording contract worth $500.00 and a gift certificate to Family Christian Stores! (crowd goes crazy).
"Let's meet our Finalists!! First Darrell Evans! (crowd goes wild)"
Host: "Darrell, you've been a worship leader for a long time, how do you feel to be a finalist in American Worship Idol?"
Darrell: "I feel great, although, makeup takes a bit longer than normal when you're on Faith TV."
Host: "Don't I know it! Darrell, what will you be performing tonight?"
Darrell: I'm going to play my song "Trading My Sorrows."
Host: "And what's it about?"
Darrell: "It's actually about taking my sorrows and trading them."
Host: "Wow, I can't wait. Folks, here's Darrell Evans."
(sings the song)
Host: "Yes Lord, Yes Lord, Yes Yes LORD! Darrell Evans!! Let's see what the judges had to say!"
Judge 1 - Jim Smith, a youth paztor (spelled with a z): "whooaaa dawg, you had this crowd PUMPED (crowd cheers). I loved your stage presence, and you really did a nice job with your E minor chords. Props!" (crowd cheers)
Judge 2 - Chris Chen, pastor's wife: "I just think you are terrific. Praise the Lord!" (crowd cheers)
Judge 3 - Lymon Scowl, BIG TIME worship music producer/judge from the UK: (in his british accent) "Look, when we started the competition, we wanted to see who was the best person at leading Christians into worship. And so we were looking for someone who was A) Good looking, B) Talented, and C) is a Christian. You are definitely a Christian and are talented, but I just don't know about your looks. (crowd boos) LOOK, I'm just being honest like the bible says. . . .
Host: "Ok, time for contestent #2 - CHRIS TOMLIN!! (crowd goes double crazy). Hey Chris, how do you feel right now?"
Chris: "I feel like, you know, awesome!"
Host: "haha - WOW! And how has this experience been?"
Chris: "It's been just awesome. I mean, the crowds are awesome (cheers), and the food is awesome."
Host: "You bet! Awesome! AWESOME! What song are you going to sing?"
Chris: "It's a song called "how great is our God". In it, I pose a question: How great is our God? Hopefully, the audience knows just how great."
Host: "Wow, a worship song with a question? Are we ready? Here's Chris!"
(plays the song)
Host: "And let's see what the judges said!"
Judge 1 - "Wow Dawg, you were unchained tonight in your reverence. . . .AND your rockability. Great usage of the hand raising in the middle of the song. I love the gucci shades! You are the complete worship leader package. For my money, you're my American Christian Idol."
Chris: "Wow, thanks."
Judge 2 - "You are so hot. I mean, I love my husband, but ooooh man, I could just"
Host: "Ok, and 3rd judge?"
Judge 3 - "Let's see. You're a Christian, talented, and are so good looking. It's that simple - you're the winner".
Host: "Let's see what America said in their voting. It's Chris - he's the winner! America has voted - and the worship that Chris plays is actually BETTER than EVERYONE ELSE'S!! He wins the $500.00 recording contract and the Family Christian stores gift certificate!"
Darrell: "But that's not what worship is..."
Host: "Sit down, 2nd place, when Chris sings it, God is more blessed - and so are Americans!!"
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It's destined to be an instant hit.
I think what it really gets at in me is a real weariness of what worship is "supposed to be." For 18 months, I've led worship for a tiny service at a big church. People did come and did worship, but it certainly hasn't looked like I hoped. We put together a service in hopes that we'd reach out to a new generation. We want community, we want to see the Gospel lived out. We want to live as a Kingdom outpost here as a "City within a city". We desire "kingdom living". What we have:
-a church service
-performing
-just "pulling it off" each week in hopes of higher numbers.
Sad. And I point the finger at myself first. But here's what I'm tired of;
The ideal "American worship experience." I've been caught in that bullshit trap for way too long. When people my age talk to each other about church, often one of the first things asked is "how's the worship?" How's the worship? Or, translated, how's the band? Are they cool? Are they still playing lame old songs? How's the drummer? Are the singers really good? Do a lot of people already go to the church? Is it exciting?
To think that I have any responsibility over the heart of another Christian is crap - but yet I've lived that way, beating myself up over low attendance, feeling embarrassed on the sundays that were particularly sparse. Sunday after Sunday, arriving to lead music for a group of people who much of the time are mouthing the words, staring at their feet, or the screen, or whatever. And no, I'm not blaming the people that are showing up. But I think it's time to realize that when churches are exploding with growth amongst 20's and 30's, and others aren't, there's a religious "vendor war" going on out there, and for whatever reason, our service hasn't provided the right goods and services.
Jesus forgive me for believing this crap. Forgive me for being caught up into this version of church, more than into You.
No, I never ever ever ever expected to be some big hot-shot worship leader. No, I don't want to play at the passion conferences. I wanted to see more people worship Christ. But instead I saw myself slip into a rut of performance, turning my sabbath days into days wallowing in my shame. "Maybe I'll do better next week." Bullshit.
I'm tired, pissed. It's nobody's fault for the condition of my heart but my own. It's not a heart that cries out: "Jesus, I need you for who you are."
Some stuff transpired on Sunday in our church service that has set off a wild set of events in my head. Basically, while attending a church meeting (awesome) after the service, I had a case of verbal diarhea, spewing forth months (and years) worth of pent up frustration and anger. And I now am left with the "what now" in the wake of it. The meeting had to do with the worship service that I've been leading worship at. And, as is the case with Christ, He seems to take great pleasure in using all events to teach and instruct, and help them to get to the bottom of where our hearts are now.
I was going on 4 and a half hours of sleep yesterday evening while driving to the grocery store up the hill. I got in the car, started it, turned left onto Meyer to settle in for my 25 second drive - and a thought occured to me.
"Hey, you know what would be great? A Christian American Idol!!"
And then, in the next 25 seconds, it played out in my head, and I have it all planned out. Here's a sample script:
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"Live, from COLORADO SPRINGS! It's AMERICAN CHRISTIAN IDOL!!!" (crowd made up of mostly youth group girls goes crazy)
"Tonight, we have our two FINALISTS in the running to see who rocks the hardest, sings the purest, and praises the holiest!! (crowd goes crazy) The winner gets a recording contract worth $500.00 and a gift certificate to Family Christian Stores! (crowd goes crazy).
"Let's meet our Finalists!! First Darrell Evans! (crowd goes wild)"
Host: "Darrell, you've been a worship leader for a long time, how do you feel to be a finalist in American Worship Idol?"
Darrell: "I feel great, although, makeup takes a bit longer than normal when you're on Faith TV."
Host: "Don't I know it! Darrell, what will you be performing tonight?"
Darrell: I'm going to play my song "Trading My Sorrows."
Host: "And what's it about?"
Darrell: "It's actually about taking my sorrows and trading them."
Host: "Wow, I can't wait. Folks, here's Darrell Evans."
(sings the song)
Host: "Yes Lord, Yes Lord, Yes Yes LORD! Darrell Evans!! Let's see what the judges had to say!"
Judge 1 - Jim Smith, a youth paztor (spelled with a z): "whooaaa dawg, you had this crowd PUMPED (crowd cheers). I loved your stage presence, and you really did a nice job with your E minor chords. Props!" (crowd cheers)
Judge 2 - Chris Chen, pastor's wife: "I just think you are terrific. Praise the Lord!" (crowd cheers)
Judge 3 - Lymon Scowl, BIG TIME worship music producer/judge from the UK: (in his british accent) "Look, when we started the competition, we wanted to see who was the best person at leading Christians into worship. And so we were looking for someone who was A) Good looking, B) Talented, and C) is a Christian. You are definitely a Christian and are talented, but I just don't know about your looks. (crowd boos) LOOK, I'm just being honest like the bible says. . . .
Host: "Ok, time for contestent #2 - CHRIS TOMLIN!! (crowd goes double crazy). Hey Chris, how do you feel right now?"
Chris: "I feel like, you know, awesome!"
Host: "haha - WOW! And how has this experience been?"
Chris: "It's been just awesome. I mean, the crowds are awesome (cheers), and the food is awesome."
Host: "You bet! Awesome! AWESOME! What song are you going to sing?"
Chris: "It's a song called "how great is our God". In it, I pose a question: How great is our God? Hopefully, the audience knows just how great."
Host: "Wow, a worship song with a question? Are we ready? Here's Chris!"
(plays the song)
Host: "And let's see what the judges said!"
Judge 1 - "Wow Dawg, you were unchained tonight in your reverence. . . .AND your rockability. Great usage of the hand raising in the middle of the song. I love the gucci shades! You are the complete worship leader package. For my money, you're my American Christian Idol."
Chris: "Wow, thanks."
Judge 2 - "You are so hot. I mean, I love my husband, but ooooh man, I could just"
Host: "Ok, and 3rd judge?"
Judge 3 - "Let's see. You're a Christian, talented, and are so good looking. It's that simple - you're the winner".
Host: "Let's see what America said in their voting. It's Chris - he's the winner! America has voted - and the worship that Chris plays is actually BETTER than EVERYONE ELSE'S!! He wins the $500.00 recording contract and the Family Christian stores gift certificate!"
Darrell: "But that's not what worship is..."
Host: "Sit down, 2nd place, when Chris sings it, God is more blessed - and so are Americans!!"
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It's destined to be an instant hit.
I think what it really gets at in me is a real weariness of what worship is "supposed to be." For 18 months, I've led worship for a tiny service at a big church. People did come and did worship, but it certainly hasn't looked like I hoped. We put together a service in hopes that we'd reach out to a new generation. We want community, we want to see the Gospel lived out. We want to live as a Kingdom outpost here as a "City within a city". We desire "kingdom living". What we have:
-a church service
-performing
-just "pulling it off" each week in hopes of higher numbers.
Sad. And I point the finger at myself first. But here's what I'm tired of;
The ideal "American worship experience." I've been caught in that bullshit trap for way too long. When people my age talk to each other about church, often one of the first things asked is "how's the worship?" How's the worship? Or, translated, how's the band? Are they cool? Are they still playing lame old songs? How's the drummer? Are the singers really good? Do a lot of people already go to the church? Is it exciting?
To think that I have any responsibility over the heart of another Christian is crap - but yet I've lived that way, beating myself up over low attendance, feeling embarrassed on the sundays that were particularly sparse. Sunday after Sunday, arriving to lead music for a group of people who much of the time are mouthing the words, staring at their feet, or the screen, or whatever. And no, I'm not blaming the people that are showing up. But I think it's time to realize that when churches are exploding with growth amongst 20's and 30's, and others aren't, there's a religious "vendor war" going on out there, and for whatever reason, our service hasn't provided the right goods and services.
Jesus forgive me for believing this crap. Forgive me for being caught up into this version of church, more than into You.
No, I never ever ever ever expected to be some big hot-shot worship leader. No, I don't want to play at the passion conferences. I wanted to see more people worship Christ. But instead I saw myself slip into a rut of performance, turning my sabbath days into days wallowing in my shame. "Maybe I'll do better next week." Bullshit.
I'm tired, pissed. It's nobody's fault for the condition of my heart but my own. It's not a heart that cries out: "Jesus, I need you for who you are."
Thursday, November 8, 2007
Thoughts on billboards
Unintentional comedy is one of the greatest creations of God's hand. Thank you, Jesus, for giving us laughter out of things that aren't meant to be funny. It's truly His redemptive work. Example:
-or-
Funny, although not meant to be originally.
Ashley and I marvel at the unintentional comedy we see around us daily. It's one of the things I love about her. We laugh at our kids when they try to get really mad over nothing and turn out to be so cute. We laugh at the mundane things of life. We laugh at church. . . .
Church? Really? What's so funny about church? Jeremy, church is serious business - it's the hospital. . . .for the sick. . . .soul. Do you WANT to burn in hell?
The answer is no. But here's a small piece of advice for churches. Please, churches, please please please, take down the freaking signs you put up out front for all passersby to see. Please - you embarass me greatly. Please, I beg you - do not EVER put up in front of your church, any of the following:
God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.
Have you read my #1 best seller? There's going to be a test. - God
We don't change the message, the message changes us.
Don't put a question mark where God put a period.
We need to talk - God
Be ye fishers of men. You catch 'em - He'll clean 'em.
Let's meet at my house Sunday, before the game - God
God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.
C'mon over and bring the kids - God
Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
What part of "Thou Shalt Not..." didn't you understand? - God
Keep using my name in vain, I'll make rush hour longer - God
Loved the wedding, invite me to the marriage - God
God grades on the cross, not the curve.
That "Love They Neighbor" thing... I meant it - God
I love you and you and you and you and... - God
Will the road you're on get you to my place? - God
God loves everyone, but probably prefers "fruits of the spirit" over "religious nuts!"
Follow me - God
The Will of God will never take you to where the Grace of God will not protect you.
Big Bang theory, you've got to be kidding - God
My way is the highway - God
Prayer: Don't give God instructions - just report for duty!
Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.
You think it's hot here? - God
Most people want to serve God, but only in an advisory capacity.
Do you have any idea where you're going? - God
Don't make me come down there - God
Forbidden fruits create many jams.
Want to make God laugh? Tell him your future plans.
He who angers you, controls you!
If God is your Co-pilot - swap seats!
God Answers Knee-Mail
Memberships available free to everyone under the son.
The Bible is Not Antique, Nor is it Modern, it is Eternal.
Forbidden fruit creates many jams.
If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again.
Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world.
Turn Life's Cares into Prayers.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++
Thoughts? I love all of them that end with "-God".
-or-
Funny, although not meant to be originally.
Ashley and I marvel at the unintentional comedy we see around us daily. It's one of the things I love about her. We laugh at our kids when they try to get really mad over nothing and turn out to be so cute. We laugh at the mundane things of life. We laugh at church. . . .
Church? Really? What's so funny about church? Jeremy, church is serious business - it's the hospital. . . .for the sick. . . .soul. Do you WANT to burn in hell?
The answer is no. But here's a small piece of advice for churches. Please, churches, please please please, take down the freaking signs you put up out front for all passersby to see. Please - you embarass me greatly. Please, I beg you - do not EVER put up in front of your church, any of the following:
God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.
Have you read my #1 best seller? There's going to be a test. - God
We don't change the message, the message changes us.
Don't put a question mark where God put a period.
We need to talk - God
Be ye fishers of men. You catch 'em - He'll clean 'em.
Let's meet at my house Sunday, before the game - God
God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.
C'mon over and bring the kids - God
Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
What part of "Thou Shalt Not..." didn't you understand? - God
Keep using my name in vain, I'll make rush hour longer - God
Loved the wedding, invite me to the marriage - God
God grades on the cross, not the curve.
That "Love They Neighbor" thing... I meant it - God
I love you and you and you and you and... - God
Will the road you're on get you to my place? - God
God loves everyone, but probably prefers "fruits of the spirit" over "religious nuts!"
Follow me - God
The Will of God will never take you to where the Grace of God will not protect you.
Big Bang theory, you've got to be kidding - God
My way is the highway - God
Prayer: Don't give God instructions - just report for duty!
Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.
You think it's hot here? - God
Most people want to serve God, but only in an advisory capacity.
Do you have any idea where you're going? - God
Don't make me come down there - God
Forbidden fruits create many jams.
Want to make God laugh? Tell him your future plans.
He who angers you, controls you!
If God is your Co-pilot - swap seats!
God Answers Knee-Mail
Memberships available free to everyone under the son.
The Bible is Not Antique, Nor is it Modern, it is Eternal.
Forbidden fruit creates many jams.
If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again.
Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world.
Turn Life's Cares into Prayers.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++
Thoughts? I love all of them that end with "-God".
Saturday, November 3, 2007
Thoughts on cynicism
Cynicism becomes me. What can I say? I am unsure if I should feel guilty about it, or if I should embrace my inner cynicism, ask God to channel it, and make me the most cut throat, acid-tongued evangelist crusader for Christ ever? Probably the latter because, when confronted by trials and tribulations that life brings, I'll just compare them to an awful song by Sandi Patti or Twila Paris, etc. and laugh my way out of them.
"This situation sucks, but at least I have Twila's 'God is in control' to listen to."
"Man, church was lame today. The crowd was smaller than Sandi Patti's last tour."
"I feel very embarassed today. At least I'm not as embarassing as Avalon."
"Work was so boring today. I felt like I was listening to Susan Ashton's latest."
"I had a really tough decision to make today. At least I didn't have to decide between listening to BeBe or CeCe."
I find myself in that place of life now. . .
Maybe it's just that life isn't easy - life is full, busy, and things don't always go how I hope they would. True.
Maybe it's that Christian music is that easy to rip on. True.
Maybe I am wicked to the core. True.
Maybe I should repent. True.
Maybe THEY should repent for making me feel the way I do. DOUBLE TRUE.
Guilt comes creeping at the doorway of my heart, threatening me with thoughts of losing God's blessing for thinking such thoughts about His followers and those that obviously have larger ministries than me. But. . . .I slam the door in its face. Why? Because I identify all of the above with religious culture; culture responsible for people I know who say things like "I am teaching my kids to be good people to earn God's blessing." People who ridicule homosexuals for being sinners while ignoring their own sin. People who ignore the need for change in church, thinking that everything is fine the way it's been, while a new generation is ignored, and subsequently blamed, for the church's decline. I call it like I see it. Cynicism?
Yes, I am cynical. May God use it as an agent of change and forgive me for the rest.
"This situation sucks, but at least I have Twila's 'God is in control' to listen to."
"Man, church was lame today. The crowd was smaller than Sandi Patti's last tour."
"I feel very embarassed today. At least I'm not as embarassing as Avalon."
"Work was so boring today. I felt like I was listening to Susan Ashton's latest."
"I had a really tough decision to make today. At least I didn't have to decide between listening to BeBe or CeCe."I find myself in that place of life now. . .
Maybe it's just that life isn't easy - life is full, busy, and things don't always go how I hope they would. True.
Maybe it's that Christian music is that easy to rip on. True.
Maybe I am wicked to the core. True.
Maybe I should repent. True.
Maybe THEY should repent for making me feel the way I do. DOUBLE TRUE.
Guilt comes creeping at the doorway of my heart, threatening me with thoughts of losing God's blessing for thinking such thoughts about His followers and those that obviously have larger ministries than me. But. . . .I slam the door in its face. Why? Because I identify all of the above with religious culture; culture responsible for people I know who say things like "I am teaching my kids to be good people to earn God's blessing." People who ridicule homosexuals for being sinners while ignoring their own sin. People who ignore the need for change in church, thinking that everything is fine the way it's been, while a new generation is ignored, and subsequently blamed, for the church's decline. I call it like I see it. Cynicism?
Yes, I am cynical. May God use it as an agent of change and forgive me for the rest.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Thoughts on friendship
You know what's sad? A 27 year old man being sleepy at 8:30.
I have just gone through a whirlwind hour of being with my two boys. Typically they have energy to spare....tonight, they could power my whole home if we could somehow harness their energy. Maybe if I built two big hampster wheels and put them in a cage.....hmmm. I knew it was especially bad tonight when they started making up words and yelling them. Micah, in a fit of energetic joy, put two collectors edition DVD cases on his hands, went out on the deck and pounded the glass. He came inside and said "dad, did you see my sussix sticks?"
"Your what?"
"My sussix sticks - I put them on my hands and they helped me."
"Ohhhh....wowwww!"
With that, I settle in at the iBook, ready to blog the evening away. I have my decaf starbucks house blend, made in a french press, cream currently blending itself into the coffee. Ahhh, this is a good evening.
Here's some thoughts from the past few days:
-I had a great time taking pictures at a wedding along with my lovely wife last Saturday for about 16 hours. It was, indeed, a long day. The wedding was a trip - most of the family was fully Hispanic. The music they liked ranged from Tupac's "California Love" to Los Jefes Del Ritmo (Mexican "polka" style music). And what an honor to get to take their pictures. They are full of smiles and joy - and man, hispanic people know how to party. It doesn't hurt that the wedding was sponsored by Bud Light (or could have been) and that more cans than I can count were consumed during the reception. . . .and after the ceremony. . . .and before the ceremony. . . .and early in the morning. I declined their invitation to have a beer - at 9:30 AM.
Anyways - Ash will post the pics from the wedding on her blog. I hope to have at least one that "makes the cut" and is displayed. That might be a stretch - anyone that's seen her blog lately knows that I have catching up to do.
-I am gaining more respect at work - having been "put in charge" of the crew for a day when the other bosses left town. I'm being "groomed" to be a manager in this company which is a good feeling - they believe in my potential. That helps me know that I'll have a job tomorrow unlike a lot of the guys I work with who get fired. Apparently, I'm a lot smarter than the other guys I work with - I just can't run machines like they can.
So I'm respected now. But with that respect comes the need to actually know the people that I work with. For instance, I found out that a co-worker of mine has a girlfriend. Actual conversation:
"So, you have a girlfriend?"
(In a slow southern drawl): "Yeeeah - she's got a stomach on her, but her legs are skinny."
(In my mind): "You have got to be kidding me. . . .is this guy for real? I didn't ask about her looks!?"
And - another conversation with the same guy:
Him: "Do you smoke?"
"No."
"That's good - it's a filthy habit." He takes a drag and blows it out his nose. "Yeeeah, I started after I had open heart surgery."
(In my mind): "You have got to be kidding me."
And - another comment by the same guy:
Him: "You know, all religions are pretty much based on catholicism."
(In my mind): ". . . . . . . ."
Lord beer me strength.
-I found out that I have "closet viewers", or, viewers who don't leave comments. They know who they are - and I know who they are (at least some of them). I expect this to change soon - and that they will know the liberating feeling of leaving a comment.
But, I'm up to like, 8 readers, or something like that. I can't even count all of them. . .on one hand. And wow, it's read WORLDWIDE! I got a phone call from an old friend this week who said he stayed up until after midnight laughing at John Daker. Moments like that make blogging worth it.
And I guess I get to thinking about how blessed I am to have the simple pleasure of friendship with you all - even though blogging might be a lame furthering of friendship (compared to sharing coffee and conversation). How much I care for each and every one of you, regardless of where you're at, when we spoke last, distance apart, etc. The truth is, you're all a gift to me, and I am so honored and blessed to share life with you guys. I am blessed to call you all my friends (or family depending on who's reading). I am blessed to know you guys. I know that life apart from you would be so much less fulfilling. You guys are the "great cloud of witnesses" here that I see cheering me on, that Hebrews 12 talks about.
So, readers in, and out of the closet (wait, did I just say that?), know you're loved in my heart. Know that I thank God for each of you, and that the door is always open - here at the house, or just that fake door over the phone or on the internet.
I have just gone through a whirlwind hour of being with my two boys. Typically they have energy to spare....tonight, they could power my whole home if we could somehow harness their energy. Maybe if I built two big hampster wheels and put them in a cage.....hmmm. I knew it was especially bad tonight when they started making up words and yelling them. Micah, in a fit of energetic joy, put two collectors edition DVD cases on his hands, went out on the deck and pounded the glass. He came inside and said "dad, did you see my sussix sticks?"
"Your what?"
"My sussix sticks - I put them on my hands and they helped me."
"Ohhhh....wowwww!"
With that, I settle in at the iBook, ready to blog the evening away. I have my decaf starbucks house blend, made in a french press, cream currently blending itself into the coffee. Ahhh, this is a good evening.
Here's some thoughts from the past few days:
-I had a great time taking pictures at a wedding along with my lovely wife last Saturday for about 16 hours. It was, indeed, a long day. The wedding was a trip - most of the family was fully Hispanic. The music they liked ranged from Tupac's "California Love" to Los Jefes Del Ritmo (Mexican "polka" style music). And what an honor to get to take their pictures. They are full of smiles and joy - and man, hispanic people know how to party. It doesn't hurt that the wedding was sponsored by Bud Light (or could have been) and that more cans than I can count were consumed during the reception. . . .and after the ceremony. . . .and before the ceremony. . . .and early in the morning. I declined their invitation to have a beer - at 9:30 AM.
Anyways - Ash will post the pics from the wedding on her blog. I hope to have at least one that "makes the cut" and is displayed. That might be a stretch - anyone that's seen her blog lately knows that I have catching up to do.
-I am gaining more respect at work - having been "put in charge" of the crew for a day when the other bosses left town. I'm being "groomed" to be a manager in this company which is a good feeling - they believe in my potential. That helps me know that I'll have a job tomorrow unlike a lot of the guys I work with who get fired. Apparently, I'm a lot smarter than the other guys I work with - I just can't run machines like they can.
So I'm respected now. But with that respect comes the need to actually know the people that I work with. For instance, I found out that a co-worker of mine has a girlfriend. Actual conversation:
"So, you have a girlfriend?"
(In a slow southern drawl): "Yeeeah - she's got a stomach on her, but her legs are skinny."
(In my mind): "You have got to be kidding me. . . .is this guy for real? I didn't ask about her looks!?"
And - another conversation with the same guy:
Him: "Do you smoke?"
"No."
"That's good - it's a filthy habit." He takes a drag and blows it out his nose. "Yeeeah, I started after I had open heart surgery."
(In my mind): "You have got to be kidding me."
And - another comment by the same guy:
Him: "You know, all religions are pretty much based on catholicism."
(In my mind): ". . . . . . . ."
Lord beer me strength.
-I found out that I have "closet viewers", or, viewers who don't leave comments. They know who they are - and I know who they are (at least some of them). I expect this to change soon - and that they will know the liberating feeling of leaving a comment.
But, I'm up to like, 8 readers, or something like that. I can't even count all of them. . .on one hand. And wow, it's read WORLDWIDE! I got a phone call from an old friend this week who said he stayed up until after midnight laughing at John Daker. Moments like that make blogging worth it.
And I guess I get to thinking about how blessed I am to have the simple pleasure of friendship with you all - even though blogging might be a lame furthering of friendship (compared to sharing coffee and conversation). How much I care for each and every one of you, regardless of where you're at, when we spoke last, distance apart, etc. The truth is, you're all a gift to me, and I am so honored and blessed to share life with you guys. I am blessed to call you all my friends (or family depending on who's reading). I am blessed to know you guys. I know that life apart from you would be so much less fulfilling. You guys are the "great cloud of witnesses" here that I see cheering me on, that Hebrews 12 talks about.
So, readers in, and out of the closet (wait, did I just say that?), know you're loved in my heart. Know that I thank God for each of you, and that the door is always open - here at the house, or just that fake door over the phone or on the internet.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Thoughts on wonder
I worked a 13 hour day today - from dark to dark. Working a day like that, you can imagine I had some time to my thoughts. And what happens when I get lost in my thoughts? I BLOG!!! YAY!! Here we go.
As a Christian, I have grown very accustomed to the christiany language. Some examples:
"Pre-marital sex": THE cardinal sin for all young Christians. Never mind that when someone does have pre-marital sex, the entire youth group gossips about it. . . in the name of "prayer." Right.
"5-point calvinist": typically, it's the people in church that are in most need of having a beer. . . .a large beer.
"Courtship": what Christians do instead of dating. We have officially "Kissed Dating Goodbye." Thanks to Joshua Harris for making millions of Christian kids feel bad for having dating relationships.
"Church": the building where you go on Sundays.
"Worship": unlike the real definition of worship in the dictionary, in today's world, it's the part of the church service where you sing songs. Worship can be categorized into a few categories: "good", "okay", or "I didn't like it." The meaning of the word "worship" is completely different than the dictionary.
And like the above, Christian culture has re-defined the meaning of many words. And today, it bothered me greatly.
For one thing, we, as Christians, tend to repeat many of the same phrases over and over. We do not purposefully change the definition of words, but by liberally using many phrases, they have lost their potency. And what it's left us with is the loss of the gravity and depth of those words. Words like "awesome", "majestic", "glorious", "gracious", and "merciful" become mundane and stagnant when thrown around. Saying "God is majestic" can become simply a phrase.
And I came to thinking about all of the things that I take for granted in my world around me, mostly, the visible things. "God is wonderful", or full of wonder. The earth is His, and everything in it; the earth is filled with His wonders. And I take them for granted.
And so I, this week, have attempted to renew my awareness of the wonder of God's creation. Amidst the mundane, it remains: wondrous, perfect, mysterious. Just stop and look at the deep blue of the evening sky. Just stop and look - and know He is God.
That's where I'm at. . . .even as I spew diesel fumes into the air every day during the week.
As a Christian, I have grown very accustomed to the christiany language. Some examples:
"Pre-marital sex": THE cardinal sin for all young Christians. Never mind that when someone does have pre-marital sex, the entire youth group gossips about it. . . in the name of "prayer." Right.
"5-point calvinist": typically, it's the people in church that are in most need of having a beer. . . .a large beer.
"Courtship": what Christians do instead of dating. We have officially "Kissed Dating Goodbye." Thanks to Joshua Harris for making millions of Christian kids feel bad for having dating relationships.
"Church": the building where you go on Sundays.
"Worship": unlike the real definition of worship in the dictionary, in today's world, it's the part of the church service where you sing songs. Worship can be categorized into a few categories: "good", "okay", or "I didn't like it." The meaning of the word "worship" is completely different than the dictionary.
And like the above, Christian culture has re-defined the meaning of many words. And today, it bothered me greatly.
For one thing, we, as Christians, tend to repeat many of the same phrases over and over. We do not purposefully change the definition of words, but by liberally using many phrases, they have lost their potency. And what it's left us with is the loss of the gravity and depth of those words. Words like "awesome", "majestic", "glorious", "gracious", and "merciful" become mundane and stagnant when thrown around. Saying "God is majestic" can become simply a phrase.
And I came to thinking about all of the things that I take for granted in my world around me, mostly, the visible things. "God is wonderful", or full of wonder. The earth is His, and everything in it; the earth is filled with His wonders. And I take them for granted.
And so I, this week, have attempted to renew my awareness of the wonder of God's creation. Amidst the mundane, it remains: wondrous, perfect, mysterious. Just stop and look at the deep blue of the evening sky. Just stop and look - and know He is God.
That's where I'm at. . . .even as I spew diesel fumes into the air every day during the week.
Sunday, October 21, 2007
Thoughts on increasing church attendance
Most everyone knows that I am the worship leader for a small church service here in Kansas City. It started in 2006 amongst a group of younger adults who longed for a service they could call "their own", and in turn, reach out to Kansas City.
It has not gone as we'd hoped.
I am being very frank and honest here which is difficult considering that I am a very very large part of the makeup of the service. Therefore, much of the "blame" for why the service hasn't worked, I place squarely on my own shoulders.
"Perhaps my voice just wasn't good enough."
"I just couldn't build a committed band."
"I just didn't choose the right songs."
Blah blah blah. Attacks - I really know that's all that those things are - but nonetheless, this blog is called "just my thoughts" and those ARE my thoughts.
As numbers have dipped to new lows, my heart sinks along with it. Spiritually dry, I find myself longing to be out from behind the mic, somewhere able to worship Christ without the constant thinking about "change the chord NOW" or "I hope the power point is in the right order" or "sheesh, I guess nobody likes this song. . . ." True, it seems that my heart is linked to the attendance of the service.
With all of this in mind, something I saw out front of a church the other day really caught my attention. No, it wasn't a church bilboard proclaiming God's wrath on our sinful humanity. It was worse. The banner rolled out in front of this church (I don't know the name) said:
"Voted best place in the southland to worship."
WHAT THE?? Who voted? Their own congregation? How did this church win? And what kind of IDIOT puts a banner out front of your church saying that you're the best? I can only figure these things:
-They truly are "the best." They worship better than other churches. They use only the finest songs, the finest singers, the most talented dancers, ALL of the instruments. . . .and God truly IS happier.
-It really is the best place to worship in the southland. This could mean a few things:
-Heated leather massage chairs for congregants to sit in while making a joyful noise. The massages could evoke some new joyful noises like "ooooooh" and "aaaaaaaaah". . . or "man I had such a hard week, but the Holy Spirit worked out the kinks. . . .praise Jesus - this IS the best place to worship."
-Free catered lunch every Sunday.
-Free church "Giveaways" and door prizes like "first fifty people that come get an iPod".
What disgusts me most about the sign is the blatant propaganda this church is using to attract new visitors. And how sad! Instead of an inviting place because Christ's followers go there and have brought them in, they are resorting to the gimmicks that fast food restaurants use. Strip-mall church - come and see. . . .why the worship here is the best. It makes me sick.
But the harder part about it is that it convicts me deeply of my own wickedness in this area. I want to sell people Jesus like a store sells goods and services. But He is not a product to be sold. He is God.
I want the gospel to be a pretty, neat package. I want to tell people - come and see, your diseases and addictions will disappear, guaranteed! I want to tell people that they are going to be wealthier.
But I can't because at the heart of this gospel lies the Hero of my faith; broken, bleeding and dying on a rugged cross. I see Him suffering. I see Him poor and opressed and embarassed and lonely and plain looking and sad. I see Him homeless. I see Him tortured.
Best place to worship in the southland?? What a crock of crap - may God have mercy.
Come to Jesus. But don't come because a church has great programs or advertises great worship experiences. Come because He is God, and He is good.
It has not gone as we'd hoped.
I am being very frank and honest here which is difficult considering that I am a very very large part of the makeup of the service. Therefore, much of the "blame" for why the service hasn't worked, I place squarely on my own shoulders.
"Perhaps my voice just wasn't good enough."
"I just couldn't build a committed band."
"I just didn't choose the right songs."
Blah blah blah. Attacks - I really know that's all that those things are - but nonetheless, this blog is called "just my thoughts" and those ARE my thoughts.
As numbers have dipped to new lows, my heart sinks along with it. Spiritually dry, I find myself longing to be out from behind the mic, somewhere able to worship Christ without the constant thinking about "change the chord NOW" or "I hope the power point is in the right order" or "sheesh, I guess nobody likes this song. . . ." True, it seems that my heart is linked to the attendance of the service.
With all of this in mind, something I saw out front of a church the other day really caught my attention. No, it wasn't a church bilboard proclaiming God's wrath on our sinful humanity. It was worse. The banner rolled out in front of this church (I don't know the name) said:
"Voted best place in the southland to worship."
WHAT THE?? Who voted? Their own congregation? How did this church win? And what kind of IDIOT puts a banner out front of your church saying that you're the best? I can only figure these things:
-They truly are "the best." They worship better than other churches. They use only the finest songs, the finest singers, the most talented dancers, ALL of the instruments. . . .and God truly IS happier.
-It really is the best place to worship in the southland. This could mean a few things:
-Heated leather massage chairs for congregants to sit in while making a joyful noise. The massages could evoke some new joyful noises like "ooooooh" and "aaaaaaaaah". . . or "man I had such a hard week, but the Holy Spirit worked out the kinks. . . .praise Jesus - this IS the best place to worship."
-Free catered lunch every Sunday.
-Free church "Giveaways" and door prizes like "first fifty people that come get an iPod".
What disgusts me most about the sign is the blatant propaganda this church is using to attract new visitors. And how sad! Instead of an inviting place because Christ's followers go there and have brought them in, they are resorting to the gimmicks that fast food restaurants use. Strip-mall church - come and see. . . .why the worship here is the best. It makes me sick.
But the harder part about it is that it convicts me deeply of my own wickedness in this area. I want to sell people Jesus like a store sells goods and services. But He is not a product to be sold. He is God.
I want the gospel to be a pretty, neat package. I want to tell people - come and see, your diseases and addictions will disappear, guaranteed! I want to tell people that they are going to be wealthier.
But I can't because at the heart of this gospel lies the Hero of my faith; broken, bleeding and dying on a rugged cross. I see Him suffering. I see Him poor and opressed and embarassed and lonely and plain looking and sad. I see Him homeless. I see Him tortured.
Best place to worship in the southland?? What a crock of crap - may God have mercy.
Come to Jesus. But don't come because a church has great programs or advertises great worship experiences. Come because He is God, and He is good.
Monday, October 15, 2007
Thoughts on Zoomanity
Greetings from a cloudy Kansas City, reader(s).
I am discovering lately that the greatest benefit to working in construction is the time off. How much do you get? Well, none. How much do I get to stay home? Every time it rains. After 2 and a half inches on Saturday, it was again, my day off. I am, um, not complaining. Making $0.00 today is not fabulous, but God is good and providing mercifully. So today, I have relaxed with my family. I'm grateful for this time. Sabbath rests seem few and far between on the weekends lately. Ashley had her first photography booth at a bridal show in KC lately and did great. The bridal response has been pretty incredible. Anyway, that show, combined with church equals an anti-Sabbath for our family.
What's the cure for the common busyness? A trip to the zoo. And because entrance was free, we took the kids (their second trip this year). What a beautiful day, what a beautiful family. I marvel at God's goodness.
When Daddy's home special, then often times the action ends up in the play room. . . . .with trains.
Tyler, happy to be chilling in the fake tree at the zoo.
Who has skills? Micah. Period.
What a beautiful family. It makes life beautiful.
I am discovering lately that the greatest benefit to working in construction is the time off. How much do you get? Well, none. How much do I get to stay home? Every time it rains. After 2 and a half inches on Saturday, it was again, my day off. I am, um, not complaining. Making $0.00 today is not fabulous, but God is good and providing mercifully. So today, I have relaxed with my family. I'm grateful for this time. Sabbath rests seem few and far between on the weekends lately. Ashley had her first photography booth at a bridal show in KC lately and did great. The bridal response has been pretty incredible. Anyway, that show, combined with church equals an anti-Sabbath for our family.
What's the cure for the common busyness? A trip to the zoo. And because entrance was free, we took the kids (their second trip this year). What a beautiful day, what a beautiful family. I marvel at God's goodness.
When Daddy's home special, then often times the action ends up in the play room. . . . .with trains.
Tyler, happy to be chilling in the fake tree at the zoo.
Who has skills? Micah. Period.
What a beautiful family. It makes life beautiful.
Friday, October 12, 2007
Thoughts on more flights of conchords
No, seriously all of you who read the blog (up to 3 I think by last count). I feel led to pound this into my readers' heads. Watch Flight of the Conchords - referenced in a blog entry a few days ago.
You say: "really?"
And to that I say: "yes." Watch the following - one of the greatest songs ever.
Enjoy.
You say: "really?"
And to that I say: "yes." Watch the following - one of the greatest songs ever.
Enjoy.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Thoughts on Colorado Pictures
Pics of the recent trip to CO. These are pics that I took. For many many many many more pics of the trip, see my wife's photo blog: ashleyparsonsphotography.blogspot.com.
Pics of the "old friends" referenced a couple of posts below:
Jerome, the red. Or is it magenta?
Devon, a faithful blog reader (rewarded with her picture on the blog - congrats my friend!)
Sarah, doing her best "Magnum" impression in the mountains. Nothing says "I'm a missionary in Mexico" like this pose.
Kyle, fired up for his impending wedding, shows me how excited he is about Cinderella and his cool magic wand. He told me later that Cinderella is a really "manly" Disney character. Obviously:
Jen and Jane rocking the Rio at the Bachelorette party (if by rocking you mean "sedately sitting at a table smiling"):
Clark, appearing in a vision as a pirate. . . .or zorro. . . .or whatever those tux clothes look like. Whatever the case, man this guy makes whatever look styling. . . .
And my beautiful wife. I love seeing joy on her face.
For now, goodbye to Colorado. . . . .
Pics of the "old friends" referenced a couple of posts below:
Jerome, the red. Or is it magenta?
Devon, a faithful blog reader (rewarded with her picture on the blog - congrats my friend!)
Sarah, doing her best "Magnum" impression in the mountains. Nothing says "I'm a missionary in Mexico" like this pose.
Kyle, fired up for his impending wedding, shows me how excited he is about Cinderella and his cool magic wand. He told me later that Cinderella is a really "manly" Disney character. Obviously:
Jen and Jane rocking the Rio at the Bachelorette party (if by rocking you mean "sedately sitting at a table smiling"):
Clark, appearing in a vision as a pirate. . . .or zorro. . . .or whatever those tux clothes look like. Whatever the case, man this guy makes whatever look styling. . . .
And my beautiful wife. I love seeing joy on her face.
For now, goodbye to Colorado. . . . .
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Thoughts on new hilarity
I believe that I now am introducing a new phenomenon to you, my reader. Take a quick gander at this stuff. Just enormously entertaining. I give you, Flight of the Conchords. If there's any way you can get the episodes on DVD - they are just off the wall, and hilarious.
The show goes from plot lines into these random music videos. This is a show that HBO got right. And the other great part? The lead singer looks like two of my best friends wrapped up into one - Tim and Jerome. You know who you are. And you know I'm right.
Just thought I'd pass on the new hilarity.
The show goes from plot lines into these random music videos. This is a show that HBO got right. And the other great part? The lead singer looks like two of my best friends wrapped up into one - Tim and Jerome. You know who you are. And you know I'm right.
Just thought I'd pass on the new hilarity.
Sunday, October 7, 2007
Thoughts on friendships, old and new
Buckle up, here comes a doozy of a blog post. I've been writing for 1 hour. I'll add photos to this in the coming days. Here goes:
So much has occurred in the prior 4 days, I am left reeling with a severe case of mental diarrhea. Am I able to say that on a blog? Please do not report me to the blog police. I do need this blog to remain active. My reader will be so sad.
I am in Greeley, Colorado currently - sitting up at 11 PM with "Sense and Sensibility" on (my wife is watching while I blog. . . .and I'm not watching, ahem. . . but WHY did Willoughby have to go to London and leave his wife and her sisters crying? I am depressed), packing here and there for a return flight home to Kansas City tomorrow night, and just somewhat "buzzing" in my mind about recent events. And, as always, God shows up in it in some way, for which I am very grateful.
I have been in Colorado for the main purpose of being part of my dear friends' wedding: Jen and Kyle. Kyle went to high school with my wife and I have known him since recently after I met my wife. He's a dear friend, a good man, loves Christ and will make you laugh. . . .and also likes Duke, CU, and the Denver Broncos, as unlovable as they are currently. Jen has been a more recent addition as a friend to us. We connected with her through our dear friends, the Kayls. Jen is also funny, sweet, caring and has a taste for some of our favorite things: Friends, fashion, dancing (Ashley), Margaritas and Coors light (Jeremy). And, praise Jesus, she also roots for Duke, CU, and the Denver Broncos.
What an honor to be in a wedding - but a wedding for two dear friends? What an absolute joy. I have been reminded of God's goodness in the past days just as I have been privileged to stand beside them as they wed. Celebrating a new marriage with dear friends, in the company of other dear friends, for dear friends. God is good.
And they are now in Mexico, for which I am jealous.
Sitting beside me at the wedding were two other friends: Clark and Zak. Clark, a man of wealth, makes me laugh as hard as anyone does. He is a man of travel, fashion, and his cynical sense of humor is one of a kind. Consider: he has appeared as a guest on the television show "What Not to Wear." He's more smooth than I will ever be. And yet, he cares for me and my wife deeply, as well as my two boys. And in that, I see God's hand. I am grateful for Clark.
Zak, my wife's best friend's husband, shares the exact same taste in funny movies that I do. Watching old SNL skits on nbc.com could bring, literally, weeks worth of laughter, reciting the lines of our favorite skits. This week's favorites?
-or-
Irreverence aside - laughter is good medicine for me. Consider me "healed." Zak is a great guy, and designs great websites, like my wife's: ashleyparsons.com. He's generous. . . .and a good dancer (trust me, he held me tight at the wedding).
I'm reminded of two of my most dear friends who are across the world right now, of all places: Kuwait City. Tim and Krysten are full of adventure, laughter, wisdom, grace and love. They are forever encouraging toward me. And as a result, they're missed, daily. And it made it really hard to see Tim's parents this weekend - a grim reminder that they are 12 timezones (give or take) away. I miss them, but only because God's given me a great friendship. For that I'm grateful.
I've been reacquainted with two of my closest friends. . .who are girls. And before you freak out on me, they are two of my wife's closest friends: Sarah and Devon. Throughout the years of knowing them, I've seen friendships grow despite distance apart. Sarah is a missionary in Chihuahua, Mexico; she runs a home for teenage girls who have been in an orphanage. It gives them a chance at having more freedoms, more education, and she is incredible in this ministry. Watching God's hand move her from 2nd grade teacher in Colorado to cross-cultural ministry is a true privilege. And Devon, my wife's best friend since 8th grade, like a sister to me in many ways. She, like her husband, makes me laugh, and despite the infrequence visits, it's as if no time passes when we all get together. God blesses my heart through these two.
I have also, or course, been with my friends Jane and Jerome, who by themselves are two of the most important people to me on the planet. Add in their three boys whom I've known since they're days in Jane's belly and their friendship with my kids, then you have a special friendship. They are unique in the way they can simply sit with me and everything feels as it's meant to be. The only problem is the time between visits.
And in all the ways God has blessed me with these people (and more that I haven't listed), my heart aches as our plane will leave at 6:10 PM tomorrow, and yet I find hope in what God has laid in front of my path when we touch down in KC at 8:30. The top two reasons? My wife, and my boys, the greatest blessing - my heart wells with pride for them. And as He has blessed my friendships through the years in Colorado, He has blessed, and continues to bless, my friendships in Kansas City. My brothers and sisters in Christ: Bret, Carol, Megan, Genny, Chad, Alysia, not to mention my family. I could write far more than paragraphs about all of them. He is a good God, full of blessings, full of love and grace - and not for anything that I am or will be - it's just because His character is to give to His children.
And yet, flying away is still hard, because Colorado is an old friend. Like a hot cup of coffee with an old friend, seeing today the massive forests, deep blue of the October sky, fiery dots of yellow aspen trees placed perfectly throughout the hillsides, and Longs Peak, acting as the Patriarch of the Front Range, I'm reminded again that the geography of my heart lies 600 miles to the west of my current home. And I long for the next time I return, when no doubt, like an old friend, I'll find this place welcoming, haunting, beckoning me to explore the wild places I cannot yet see with my eyes. Like a good friend, I will also return with much anticipation, eager to take up where I've left off.
I fly away from old friends, but in the arms of Christ - my provider, protector, and best friend. And in Him is the deepest satisfaction of all.
AND - the Rockies are in the NLCS. God IS good. ;)
So much has occurred in the prior 4 days, I am left reeling with a severe case of mental diarrhea. Am I able to say that on a blog? Please do not report me to the blog police. I do need this blog to remain active. My reader will be so sad.
I am in Greeley, Colorado currently - sitting up at 11 PM with "Sense and Sensibility" on (my wife is watching while I blog. . . .and I'm not watching, ahem. . . but WHY did Willoughby have to go to London and leave his wife and her sisters crying? I am depressed), packing here and there for a return flight home to Kansas City tomorrow night, and just somewhat "buzzing" in my mind about recent events. And, as always, God shows up in it in some way, for which I am very grateful.
I have been in Colorado for the main purpose of being part of my dear friends' wedding: Jen and Kyle. Kyle went to high school with my wife and I have known him since recently after I met my wife. He's a dear friend, a good man, loves Christ and will make you laugh. . . .and also likes Duke, CU, and the Denver Broncos, as unlovable as they are currently. Jen has been a more recent addition as a friend to us. We connected with her through our dear friends, the Kayls. Jen is also funny, sweet, caring and has a taste for some of our favorite things: Friends, fashion, dancing (Ashley), Margaritas and Coors light (Jeremy). And, praise Jesus, she also roots for Duke, CU, and the Denver Broncos.
What an honor to be in a wedding - but a wedding for two dear friends? What an absolute joy. I have been reminded of God's goodness in the past days just as I have been privileged to stand beside them as they wed. Celebrating a new marriage with dear friends, in the company of other dear friends, for dear friends. God is good.
And they are now in Mexico, for which I am jealous.
Sitting beside me at the wedding were two other friends: Clark and Zak. Clark, a man of wealth, makes me laugh as hard as anyone does. He is a man of travel, fashion, and his cynical sense of humor is one of a kind. Consider: he has appeared as a guest on the television show "What Not to Wear." He's more smooth than I will ever be. And yet, he cares for me and my wife deeply, as well as my two boys. And in that, I see God's hand. I am grateful for Clark.
Zak, my wife's best friend's husband, shares the exact same taste in funny movies that I do. Watching old SNL skits on nbc.com could bring, literally, weeks worth of laughter, reciting the lines of our favorite skits. This week's favorites?
-or-
Irreverence aside - laughter is good medicine for me. Consider me "healed." Zak is a great guy, and designs great websites, like my wife's: ashleyparsons.com. He's generous. . . .and a good dancer (trust me, he held me tight at the wedding).
I'm reminded of two of my most dear friends who are across the world right now, of all places: Kuwait City. Tim and Krysten are full of adventure, laughter, wisdom, grace and love. They are forever encouraging toward me. And as a result, they're missed, daily. And it made it really hard to see Tim's parents this weekend - a grim reminder that they are 12 timezones (give or take) away. I miss them, but only because God's given me a great friendship. For that I'm grateful.
I've been reacquainted with two of my closest friends. . .who are girls. And before you freak out on me, they are two of my wife's closest friends: Sarah and Devon. Throughout the years of knowing them, I've seen friendships grow despite distance apart. Sarah is a missionary in Chihuahua, Mexico; she runs a home for teenage girls who have been in an orphanage. It gives them a chance at having more freedoms, more education, and she is incredible in this ministry. Watching God's hand move her from 2nd grade teacher in Colorado to cross-cultural ministry is a true privilege. And Devon, my wife's best friend since 8th grade, like a sister to me in many ways. She, like her husband, makes me laugh, and despite the infrequence visits, it's as if no time passes when we all get together. God blesses my heart through these two.
I have also, or course, been with my friends Jane and Jerome, who by themselves are two of the most important people to me on the planet. Add in their three boys whom I've known since they're days in Jane's belly and their friendship with my kids, then you have a special friendship. They are unique in the way they can simply sit with me and everything feels as it's meant to be. The only problem is the time between visits.
And in all the ways God has blessed me with these people (and more that I haven't listed), my heart aches as our plane will leave at 6:10 PM tomorrow, and yet I find hope in what God has laid in front of my path when we touch down in KC at 8:30. The top two reasons? My wife, and my boys, the greatest blessing - my heart wells with pride for them. And as He has blessed my friendships through the years in Colorado, He has blessed, and continues to bless, my friendships in Kansas City. My brothers and sisters in Christ: Bret, Carol, Megan, Genny, Chad, Alysia, not to mention my family. I could write far more than paragraphs about all of them. He is a good God, full of blessings, full of love and grace - and not for anything that I am or will be - it's just because His character is to give to His children.
And yet, flying away is still hard, because Colorado is an old friend. Like a hot cup of coffee with an old friend, seeing today the massive forests, deep blue of the October sky, fiery dots of yellow aspen trees placed perfectly throughout the hillsides, and Longs Peak, acting as the Patriarch of the Front Range, I'm reminded again that the geography of my heart lies 600 miles to the west of my current home. And I long for the next time I return, when no doubt, like an old friend, I'll find this place welcoming, haunting, beckoning me to explore the wild places I cannot yet see with my eyes. Like a good friend, I will also return with much anticipation, eager to take up where I've left off.
I fly away from old friends, but in the arms of Christ - my provider, protector, and best friend. And in Him is the deepest satisfaction of all.
AND - the Rockies are in the NLCS. God IS good. ;)
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
Thoughts on the ragamuffin gospel and the God of Grace
Good morning faithful and dedicated blog reader. I write to you from my living room in a quiet house in Kansas City. Yes, a quiet house. My kids are at their grandparents' house, my wife is on a plane to Colorado as I write (and I go tomorrow, praise Jesus), and I am rained out of work today thanks to a 90 minute shot of moisture yesterday. In other words, I am bringing you a special morning edition of my thoughts. This might be especially bad, but whatever, you're reading it and you're stuck with me. Besides, if you endured my Appalachian is HOT HOT HOT post, and my rants about Mac Powell and Jeremy Camp - you are good to go here.
After dropping Ashley off at the airport this morning, I braved the rush-hour traffic in North Kansas City to head to my favorite little coffee joint: Starbucks. . . . .at the Plaza. . . .so quaint.
Amidst the sea of high class business-formal and business-casual apparel wearing corporate job holding Lemmings, I found myself in a nice, comfy chair with an Americano and a scone (can I be serious? I had a scone for breakfast? So manly. . .), my bible and my book, the Ragamuffin Gospel. This was a rare moment for me - time to read, think, and relax. Those times of sipping coffee and reading grow very few and far between as your kids grow (as any parent can attest to). So for just over 100 minutes, I read.
The Ragamuffin Gospel is quickly becoming a landmark book in my life.
I was skepticle of this book in the past, mostly because I saw that the foward was by Michael W. Smith. Could this book simply be a fad, or perhaps a fashionable Christian book that most Middle-class suburban dwelling American Christians should read? After all, that's what I marry with Michael W. Smith in my mind. 
I'm not here to rip on him, that's just where my mind goes when I see his name: a worship concert full of 40-somethings with pleated slacks, polo shirts, cell phone clips on their belts, and homes in the 'burbs. I am wicked to the core - but I'm right and you know it.
I am only 3 full chapters into the book - scarcely 72 pages - and it has shattered my expectations, and has began to refine my view of Christ. This isn't a "live better lives in 10 steps" book, but it's altering my foundation of faith - returning me to the Christ full of unconditional love and grace; reminding me that the gospel is for the broken and beat up. Brennan Manning has placed me front and center in the Gospel story and his words cut to the heart.
My background has always been the "good guy" - the Christian kid - the church goer - the do gooder, etc. I have, for much of my life, lived the way that "good" people do - not like "those sinners". And I've served the church. And I've gone on missions trips. And I've gone to the inner city. And I've led youth group (and learned to play acoustic guitar like every other Christian guy has at some point). And I've learned how to say the "right things" in the right way. And along the way somewhere, I have a tendency to lose sight of the grace of God.
"God is love" or so the Bible says. But if I am honest with myself, I live believing that God is love IF I do the right stuff, say the right stuff, serve more, act better. It's a flawed perception of Jesus, and I'm finding myself again confronted with the simple and pure message of the Gospel: Jesus loves me, exactly as I am, and I can do nothing to change that love. Manning writes:
"The danger with our good works, spiritual investments, and all the rest of it is that we can construct a picture of ourselves in which we situate our self-worth. Complacency then replaces sheer delight in God's unconditional love. Our doing becomes the very undoing of the ragamuffin gospel."
My "doing" becomes my undoing. Serving to gain His approval? I have it backwards! I have forgotten His love is unconditional, maybe not in my mind, but in my heart. It's a subtle difference - but what a difference! Knowing this love is constant, never-changing, fierce for me - there is peace and rest in it. And ultimately, over all things - the foundation of the Gospel message rings loudest in my ears:
"At the heart of the gospel of grace, the sky darkens, the wind howls, a young man walks up another Moriah in obedience to a God who demands everything and stops at nothing. . . This is the God of the gospel of grace. A God who, out of love for us, sent the only Son He ever had wrapped in our skin. He learned how to walk, stubled and fell, cried for His milk, sweated blood in the night, was lashed with a whip and showered with spit, was fixed to a cross, and died whispering forgiveness on us all."
I'm off to run on this beautiful fall day and to Colorado tomorrow. May your heart be encouraged in the midst of this ever-present, never-ending love from our Gracious Savior. Much, much love to all.
After dropping Ashley off at the airport this morning, I braved the rush-hour traffic in North Kansas City to head to my favorite little coffee joint: Starbucks. . . . .at the Plaza. . . .so quaint.
Amidst the sea of high class business-formal and business-casual apparel wearing corporate job holding Lemmings, I found myself in a nice, comfy chair with an Americano and a scone (can I be serious? I had a scone for breakfast? So manly. . .), my bible and my book, the Ragamuffin Gospel. This was a rare moment for me - time to read, think, and relax. Those times of sipping coffee and reading grow very few and far between as your kids grow (as any parent can attest to). So for just over 100 minutes, I read. The Ragamuffin Gospel is quickly becoming a landmark book in my life.
I was skepticle of this book in the past, mostly because I saw that the foward was by Michael W. Smith. Could this book simply be a fad, or perhaps a fashionable Christian book that most Middle-class suburban dwelling American Christians should read? After all, that's what I marry with Michael W. Smith in my mind. I'm not here to rip on him, that's just where my mind goes when I see his name: a worship concert full of 40-somethings with pleated slacks, polo shirts, cell phone clips on their belts, and homes in the 'burbs. I am wicked to the core - but I'm right and you know it.
I am only 3 full chapters into the book - scarcely 72 pages - and it has shattered my expectations, and has began to refine my view of Christ. This isn't a "live better lives in 10 steps" book, but it's altering my foundation of faith - returning me to the Christ full of unconditional love and grace; reminding me that the gospel is for the broken and beat up. Brennan Manning has placed me front and center in the Gospel story and his words cut to the heart.
My background has always been the "good guy" - the Christian kid - the church goer - the do gooder, etc. I have, for much of my life, lived the way that "good" people do - not like "those sinners". And I've served the church. And I've gone on missions trips. And I've gone to the inner city. And I've led youth group (and learned to play acoustic guitar like every other Christian guy has at some point). And I've learned how to say the "right things" in the right way. And along the way somewhere, I have a tendency to lose sight of the grace of God.
"God is love" or so the Bible says. But if I am honest with myself, I live believing that God is love IF I do the right stuff, say the right stuff, serve more, act better. It's a flawed perception of Jesus, and I'm finding myself again confronted with the simple and pure message of the Gospel: Jesus loves me, exactly as I am, and I can do nothing to change that love. Manning writes:
"The danger with our good works, spiritual investments, and all the rest of it is that we can construct a picture of ourselves in which we situate our self-worth. Complacency then replaces sheer delight in God's unconditional love. Our doing becomes the very undoing of the ragamuffin gospel."
My "doing" becomes my undoing. Serving to gain His approval? I have it backwards! I have forgotten His love is unconditional, maybe not in my mind, but in my heart. It's a subtle difference - but what a difference! Knowing this love is constant, never-changing, fierce for me - there is peace and rest in it. And ultimately, over all things - the foundation of the Gospel message rings loudest in my ears:
"At the heart of the gospel of grace, the sky darkens, the wind howls, a young man walks up another Moriah in obedience to a God who demands everything and stops at nothing. . . This is the God of the gospel of grace. A God who, out of love for us, sent the only Son He ever had wrapped in our skin. He learned how to walk, stubled and fell, cried for His milk, sweated blood in the night, was lashed with a whip and showered with spit, was fixed to a cross, and died whispering forgiveness on us all."
I'm off to run on this beautiful fall day and to Colorado tomorrow. May your heart be encouraged in the midst of this ever-present, never-ending love from our Gracious Savior. Much, much love to all.
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Thoughts on a change of life direction
A big announcement to all of my reader. You need to know this first.
Don't worry, I will continue to blog. But, life is taking me in a new direction, and, with the support of my wife (she doesn't even know this yet), I am going back to college: starting in January.
I am going to Appalachian State University. Here's the back story about this huge change:
While dinking around the "net" I came across something that changed my life forever: this video for ASU. I was sold immediately, and have already made my plans to attend next semester. I have quit my jobs, I have sold my possessions - I am jumping in. Why? Just watch:
I would appreciate your support in this venture. In fact - you're all invited. Even when it's cold, cold, cold - ASU is HOT HOT HOT!
And if you believed a word of this post, you are crazy.
Don't worry, I will continue to blog. But, life is taking me in a new direction, and, with the support of my wife (she doesn't even know this yet), I am going back to college: starting in January.
I am going to Appalachian State University. Here's the back story about this huge change:
While dinking around the "net" I came across something that changed my life forever: this video for ASU. I was sold immediately, and have already made my plans to attend next semester. I have quit my jobs, I have sold my possessions - I am jumping in. Why? Just watch:
I would appreciate your support in this venture. In fact - you're all invited. Even when it's cold, cold, cold - ASU is HOT HOT HOT!
And if you believed a word of this post, you are crazy.
Monday, September 24, 2007
Thoughts on Thursday
I am ready for Thursday.
I am also in a small group that meets Thursday nights. And I love them
I am ready for Friday.
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Thoughts on Christian Music (and stuff)
Faithful blog reader: hello. Welcome to a new post. Welcome to the cynical side of Jeremy.
Life is steady right now - full, fun, hard. . .I don't really know where to start with life lately - so I'll not start with it. I have other thoughts tonight.
I have progressed from being a full-fledged "laborer" (awesome) to becoming a heavy equipment driver.
Yes, I am living the dream of most 6 year old boys: driving things that can move tons of dirt. . . .DIRT!!! The great part though is an easier workload (I sit and drive stuff now - nice), air conditioning, and. . . .AM/FM radios. Yesssss!!! I also have the respect of more construction workers - which we all aspire to have, right?
So I have been priviledged to spend a full day as a captive audience to car commercials, sports center updates and witty banter by highly skilled DJ's. I have the jingles for the Midwest Hemerroid treatment center, Toyota and Chevy and Ford
And at a point, sports radio and standard rock stations - even NPR itself - get a bit stale. And, sigh. . . .being a christian, I. . . yes. . . .go to Christian radio. Positive. . . .encouraging. . . .Christian. . . nauseating.
And so - I have listened. And I have been positively encouraged. . . not to listen to Christian music. Ok - to be fair - one out of ten songs is good. But, the DJ's witty banter and the rest of the songs - they drive me toward jerking the wheel of the bulldozer into a bridge embankment.
Hightlights of Christian music:
First - "Christian Rock" is most definitely not rock. . . .and I'm wondering if Jesus likes it. When I first heard a Christian DJ remark: Man, that Jeremy Camp. . .he rocks!!, I thought, are you kidding me? Positive. . .encouraging. . . .Much of the time, life isn't encouraging or positive - so most Christian music is brutally wrong, most Christian music sounds the same as everything else. Why I listen to it at times is a mystery to me.
Second - Any radio station that goes to a satellite location to broadcast and has prizes to give away like. . . keychains. . . . that's just not a good radio station. Keychains? Are you freaking kidding me?
Third - Lyrics of Christian songs are definitely good at Spiritual cliches:
Ooooh Lord, you save me in the pouring rain
Your loooooove is new agaiiiiiin
Ohooooooooooooh Lord you get me through the daaaaaark night
(cue the orchetra, then sing the chorus again)
Fourth - to be a Christian music artist, your qualifications for "making it" are:
1) be good looking. You MUST be good looking to be a Christian artist - have you ever seen one who isn't? They just LOOK blessed, wealthy, happy. And most every cover of a Christian music CD featrues the artist on the cover alone - casually looking into the distance "thoughtfully", or smiling "full of the joy of the Lord" right at the camera, "broken" in worship (that just happens to show off how ripped the artist is)
. . . .or like this - with no explanation needed:
2) make a worship album. . . .with the songs on it that everyone else has already played (and feature Mac Powell)
.
Sample song list:
-Enough (already)
-How Great is our God
-Holy is the Lord
-Here I am to worship
(my worship set-list tomorrow includes how great is our god. . .sigh)
Fifth - inspire generations with non-Christian lyrics like: "it doesn't matter who you know, it's how you live" (real lyrics) Retards.
I'm done writing - now I'm pissed. What do I do now? I need some encouragement. . . .
%$&*!!. . . .I'm heading for the radio.
Life is steady right now - full, fun, hard. . .I don't really know where to start with life lately - so I'll not start with it. I have other thoughts tonight.
I have progressed from being a full-fledged "laborer" (awesome) to becoming a heavy equipment driver.
Yes, I am living the dream of most 6 year old boys: driving things that can move tons of dirt. . . .DIRT!!! The great part though is an easier workload (I sit and drive stuff now - nice), air conditioning, and. . . .AM/FM radios. Yesssss!!! I also have the respect of more construction workers - which we all aspire to have, right?
So I have been priviledged to spend a full day as a captive audience to car commercials, sports center updates and witty banter by highly skilled DJ's. I have the jingles for the Midwest Hemerroid treatment center, Toyota and Chevy and Ford
And at a point, sports radio and standard rock stations - even NPR itself - get a bit stale. And, sigh. . . .being a christian, I. . . yes. . . .go to Christian radio. Positive. . . .encouraging. . . .Christian. . . nauseating.
And so - I have listened. And I have been positively encouraged. . . not to listen to Christian music. Ok - to be fair - one out of ten songs is good. But, the DJ's witty banter and the rest of the songs - they drive me toward jerking the wheel of the bulldozer into a bridge embankment.
Hightlights of Christian music:
First - "Christian Rock" is most definitely not rock. . . .and I'm wondering if Jesus likes it. When I first heard a Christian DJ remark: Man, that Jeremy Camp. . .he rocks!!, I thought, are you kidding me? Positive. . .encouraging. . . .Much of the time, life isn't encouraging or positive - so most Christian music is brutally wrong, most Christian music sounds the same as everything else. Why I listen to it at times is a mystery to me.
Second - Any radio station that goes to a satellite location to broadcast and has prizes to give away like. . . keychains. . . . that's just not a good radio station. Keychains? Are you freaking kidding me?
Third - Lyrics of Christian songs are definitely good at Spiritual cliches:
Ooooh Lord, you save me in the pouring rain
Your loooooove is new agaiiiiiin
Ohooooooooooooh Lord you get me through the daaaaaark night
(cue the orchetra, then sing the chorus again)
Fourth - to be a Christian music artist, your qualifications for "making it" are:
1) be good looking. You MUST be good looking to be a Christian artist - have you ever seen one who isn't? They just LOOK blessed, wealthy, happy. And most every cover of a Christian music CD featrues the artist on the cover alone - casually looking into the distance "thoughtfully", or smiling "full of the joy of the Lord" right at the camera, "broken" in worship (that just happens to show off how ripped the artist is)
. . . .or like this - with no explanation needed:2) make a worship album. . . .with the songs on it that everyone else has already played (and feature Mac Powell)
. Sample song list:
-Enough (already)
-How Great is our God
-Holy is the Lord
-Here I am to worship
(my worship set-list tomorrow includes how great is our god. . .sigh)
Fifth - inspire generations with non-Christian lyrics like: "it doesn't matter who you know, it's how you live" (real lyrics) Retards.
I'm done writing - now I'm pissed. What do I do now? I need some encouragement. . . .
%$&*!!. . . .I'm heading for the radio.
Friday, September 7, 2007
Thursday, September 6, 2007
Thoughts on Typical
It helps having connections. Case in point - my sister Becca is dating a dude who tours the country playing rock music on his guitar. I like it. I like him. www.myspace.com/daphnelovesderby. He's the skinny dude with blonde hair - and oh, he's really phenominally talented (you're welcome, Spencer).
All that to say: yes, I have connections. Spencer knows more about cool bands than anyone I've ever met. He listens to the music, knows about the music videos, knows about their labels, knows about their tours, and knows many of the musicians - at least indirectly.
He was good enough on Wednesday night to share with Ashley and I his "musical inspiration": Mute Math. They are up and coming, as far as I can tell (what do I know, I have heard of them for 24 hours now), and did the theme song for the Transformers movie that came out this summer. I haven't heard that song. Watch this video (all band members learned the entire song backwards: lyrics, strumming patterns on the guitar, drum beats - remarkable):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13rc6DY74A
Here's the lyrics:
Come on, can I dream for one day?
There's nothing that can't be done
But how long should it take somebody
Before they can be someone
Cuz I know there's got to be another level
Somewhere closer to the other side
And I'm feelin' like it's now or never
Can I break the spell of the typical?
Now I've lived through my share of misfortune
And I've worked in the blazing sun
But how long should it take somebody
Before they can be someone
Cuz I know there's got to be another level
Somewhere closer to the other side
And I'm feelin' like it's now or never
Can I break the spell of the typical?
I'm the typical
I'm the typical
Can I break the spell of the typical?
Because it's draggin' me down
Oh, I'd like to know about when
When does it all turn around?
__________________
Truly it's a song that speaks to my heart, especially as of late. Mostly it's depressing. If the guys from Mute Math sing about feeling "Typical" after playing the Late Show and garnering a load of critical acclaim, then what hope is there for us who spend all day working in the hot sun, or the cubicle, or the classroom, or the four corners of the earth?
And again, I have no answers, but simply a statment: Colossians 3:17 - Whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.
He will provide, He has promised. William Cowper writes: Tomorrow can bring us nothing, but He will bear us through: Who gives the lilies clothing will clothe His people, too. So it sure seems that the fight against the "typical" isn't at all about occupation or prestige.
Where does it come from? To be His is to be more than typical - and nothing else will do. Can I rest in that and live it out? That's the hard part. Just my thoughts.
All that to say: yes, I have connections. Spencer knows more about cool bands than anyone I've ever met. He listens to the music, knows about the music videos, knows about their labels, knows about their tours, and knows many of the musicians - at least indirectly.
He was good enough on Wednesday night to share with Ashley and I his "musical inspiration": Mute Math. They are up and coming, as far as I can tell (what do I know, I have heard of them for 24 hours now), and did the theme song for the Transformers movie that came out this summer. I haven't heard that song. Watch this video (all band members learned the entire song backwards: lyrics, strumming patterns on the guitar, drum beats - remarkable):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b13rc6DY74A
Here's the lyrics:
Come on, can I dream for one day?
There's nothing that can't be done
But how long should it take somebody
Before they can be someone
Cuz I know there's got to be another level
Somewhere closer to the other side
And I'm feelin' like it's now or never
Can I break the spell of the typical?
Now I've lived through my share of misfortune
And I've worked in the blazing sun
But how long should it take somebody
Before they can be someone
Cuz I know there's got to be another level
Somewhere closer to the other side
And I'm feelin' like it's now or never
Can I break the spell of the typical?
I'm the typical
I'm the typical
Can I break the spell of the typical?
Because it's draggin' me down
Oh, I'd like to know about when
When does it all turn around?
__________________
Truly it's a song that speaks to my heart, especially as of late. Mostly it's depressing. If the guys from Mute Math sing about feeling "Typical" after playing the Late Show and garnering a load of critical acclaim, then what hope is there for us who spend all day working in the hot sun, or the cubicle, or the classroom, or the four corners of the earth?
And again, I have no answers, but simply a statment: Colossians 3:17 - Whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.
He will provide, He has promised. William Cowper writes: Tomorrow can bring us nothing, but He will bear us through: Who gives the lilies clothing will clothe His people, too. So it sure seems that the fight against the "typical" isn't at all about occupation or prestige.
Where does it come from? To be His is to be more than typical - and nothing else will do. Can I rest in that and live it out? That's the hard part. Just my thoughts.
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